Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abram's UWF

[WTIC]

Emma & Elvira? What a team! Poor Kelly, suspended! Orton was lucky he wasn't suspended for HIS interference! Mila FTW!

[bockwinkle99]

U51--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation


[glow=red,2,300]It's the Fury Hour![/glow]

Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Los Angeles, California

Fury Hour airs on SportsChannel America--3.57 rating

Craig DeGeorge, play by play, Mike Golic, color, Mike Greenberg, interviews, Capt. Lou Albano, interviews

1. Dennis Rodman p. Todd Bridges

*) During the match, "the Real American" Frank Stallone comes to ringside and sits down with Craig and Mike. As the match continues, Frank criticizes "Rodzilla", calling him a freak and "disgusting". When Mike points out that Rodman holds a win over Stallone, Frank responds that "Even a broken watch is right twice a day". After Rodman pins "Mr. Not-So-Perfect" Bridges, he spots Frank at the broadcast position as he passes. Frank removes his headset and there's a confrontation that ends with Rodman slapping Stallone. Stallone begins to remove his shirt but referee Kevin James and promoter Herb Abrams get between the two and James ushers "Rodzilla" to the back.

*) In the back, Mike Greenberg interviews Don "the Rock" Muraco, who has a match tonight against the Black Knight. Before that, he has a few words for Universal Champion "Dr. Death" Steve Williams...


Muraco: "Y'know, Greeny, I've been listening to Dr. Death, sayin' things about me, calling me the 'Hawaiian Paunch' and all that. Well, I'm not all that into talk. I don't hop around and scream like some. I just prove myself in the ring. Remember, Dr. Death, before I was 'the Rock', I was 'Magnificent', and don't for a minute think that it's still not true. I will get the title belt back. Bet on it, jabroni!"

2. Adrian Adonis p. Barry Horowitz

*) Adonis is all business as he comes to the ring and decimates "the Star of David" Barry Horowitz in his UWF debut. Herb comes into the ring and Adonis takes the stick from him.

Adonis: "I just want to thank all the beautiful people out there in beautiful TV land who have shown their support for me here in the UWF, and I just wanted to make one thing perfectly clear. I am not done yet...Herb, the pleasue has been all yours..."

**) Back from break, a promo is aired featuring Lindsay Lohan.


Lohan: "I admit that some of my choices haven't been the smartest, beginning with teaming up with Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie...I should have known from the beginning that we were going nowhere, but you know...Well, I'm back and thinking clearly now, and my focus is on you two, and that twisted manager of yours, Andy Kaufman. Andy, I know you like wrestling women out of the crowd, but how about one who knows what she's doing? And when I get rid of you, I'll take care of your new friends as well. The Mean Girl is back, and she's learned a few tricks...."

3. Judy Carne & Go-Go Goldie d. the Angels
*) Carne p. Drew Barrymore in a shocking upset that makes Carne and Goldie the new number one contenders to the women's tag team titles.

[glow=red,2,300]CAPTAIN LOU'S CORNER[/glow]: Tonight's guests are Al Bundy and TV Champion Griff.

When Lou breaches the subject of Tobin Bell and his new team, Danny Glover and Costas Mandaylor, Al takes over the interview...

BUNDY: Listen, Captain Lou Albino, I'm not scared of those guys. I'm a highly trained athlete, a football hero. Who are they? Actors. What do they really know about fear? Have they ever try to put stilleto heeled shoes with spaghetti straps onto a three hundred pound woman? No. Has a motorcycle gang ever shown up at their front door announcing they were his daughter's date? No. Are any of them married to a giant loud mouthed redhead? No! So, see, they don't know the meaning of the word. I live in fear every day of my stinking life, Tobin Bell, so bring your worst. Rest assured, I've had worse for dinner."

As they leave, Capt. Lou sniffs the air and wonders aloud what that smell is...

4. Don 'the Rock' Muraco b. the Black Knight by DQ.

*) "The Rock" is having no problem with the masked Knight until Dr. Death Steve Williams charges out of the back and levels him with a baseball bat. Wrestlers come out from the back and after much difficulty pull him away from the bloodied Muraco.

**) In back, Greeny tries to get a word with the Angels but Lucy Liu sweeps past him. Drew, at a loss for words, intimates that it may be time for the team to take a step back and re-evaluate their future in the UWF.

5. The Russians d. David Sammartino & Chief Jay Stronbow

*) Koloff p. Sammartino as the former champs solidify their hold on the top contender's slot.

6. Universal Women's Champion Luna Vachon p. Candi Devine to retain the title.

*) Despite being backed by the crowd, the Southern Belle Candi Devine is little match for the woman from the dark side, who maintains the title with two Luna Bombs that completely KO Candi.

7. Cactus Jack b. Battle Kat by countout

*) From the beginning, it's clear that Cactus has little (if any) interest in winning the match as much as hurting Kat as may ways as possible. The two men only briefly pass through the ring (only to prevent referee Jesse Hernandez from counting them both out) until Jack climbs to the top of the ringpost and executes a flying elbow atop a chair draped Battle Kat on the arena floor. Screaming in pain and holding his elbow, Jack barely beats the final ten count to get a win. The show ends with Jack smiling as medics and Hernandez tend to Battle Kat.

Come back next time for some more exciting action from the UWF. Scheduled to appear are Griff and Al Bundy taking on Danny Glover and Costas Mandaylor in a tag match, Lindsay Lohan taking on her former tag partner Paris Hilton in a one on one match, and Womens' TV Champion Peg Bundy battling Tonya Harding for the belt.

Until then, we'll see you at the matches.

The Universal Wrestling Federation...[glow=red,2,300]what the Universe is Watching...[/glow]

A personal P.S., we urge you to go to www.redcross.org and find out how you can help the people of Japan during this time of need.

[WTIC]

Great use of photos this time around! Capt Lou was sniffing the air to see what "The Rock" (Muraco) was cooking!

Lindsay, yum! Go, Cacti!

[bockwinkle99]

U52--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' UWF.

It's the...



Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Reseda, California

Fury Hour airs on SportsChannel America--2.6 rating

Craig DeGeorge (play by play); Mike Golic (color); Mike Greenburg, Capt. Lou Albano, Herb Abrams (interviews); Herb Abrams (booker/promoter)

1. Anna Nicole Smith b. Laura San Giacomo by disqualification

*) At first, referee Kevin James awards the match to San Giacomo when Smith taps out in the Nadine Crossface, but as the bell rings, San Giacomo refuses to release the hold. James reverses the decision and DQ's San Giacomo, then calls out help to pull her off. It requires James and referees Colin Mochrie and Jesse Hernandez to pry Laura loose, but it's too late and Anna Nicole must be escorted out by trainers with an injury.


**) Mike Greenberg attempts to get a comment from Dennis Rodman regarding Frank Stallone's continued insults, but the interview is interrupted by "the Real American". Stallone calls Rodman a cross-dressing freak who failed in acting and wrestling, then launches into a bleep-filled tirade. Rodman answers in kind (Golic comments later the inverview sounded like a 'Springer show episode') until promoter Herb Abrams comes out and fines both men $10,000 for their language, ordering them to settle it in the ring next week.

2. Emma Watson (w/Elvira) p. Amy Poehler (w/Tina Fey)

*) Emma survives an early onslaught by Poehler to take the victory in a match highlighted by a ringside brawl between Elvira and Fey that results in referee Mochrie ordering both women away from ringside.


[/img][/img]**) Battle Kat is featured in a videotaped promo

Kat: "Cactus Jack, you seem to forget that cats have nine lives. That means that you can do whatever you want to to a cat and they keep coming back. You didn't kill me, Cactus! I'm still here and I'm coming for you! Do your worst, Cactus! Just keep in mind that I'm Battle Kat, and cats have nine lives...a Cactus has only one!"

3. The Blackhearts (w/Luna Vachon) d. Los Conquistadors

*) The team from the dark side led by the UWF women's champ is simply too much for the boys in gold.

4. Lindsay "the Mean Girl" Lohan p. Paris Hilton (w/Andy Kaufman)

*)Lindsay gets a taste of revenge against her former tag partner, but as ref Ryan Stiles raises her hand, she is blindsided by Kaufman, who stomps her down and chokes her until Herb enters the ring and pulls Andy off by his hair. The promoter chases Andy out of the ring as Stiles and trainers tend to Lindsay.

CAPT LOU'S CORNER: Today's the Cap'n's guest is Wild Thing Stevie Ray.

In a wild interview, Ray interrupts Lou's attempts to compliment him as a talented wrestler by calling Lou "the Wild Man" and saying how he and Lou are going to "tear up this town tonight". It ends with a chuckling Lou saying that despite "missing a few screws", Stevie Ray is going to make a mark in the UWF.

5. Iceman King Parsons p. Rusty Brooks

*) Squash match. Brooks has an early offensive outburst but the match is mostly the Iceman's

6. Ladies TV Champion Peg Bundy (w/Marcy D'Arcy) p. Tonya Harding to retain the title.

*) Near the end of the match, Marcy distracts ref James long enough for a masked woman to climb into the ring and kneecap Tonya with a metal pipe. While most of the crowd believes they know who the woman was, Peg and Marcy seem to be as surprised as anyone. They deny to Herb in an in-ring post match interview that they know who it was, but Herb promises to get to the bottom of it and if he finds that the Bundys are involved Peg will lose the title.

7. Danny Glover and Costas Mandylor (w/Tobin Bell) d. TV champion Griff and Al Bundy (w/Jefferson D'Arcy)

*) This match quickly becomes a wild free for all despite Referee Mochrie's best efforts. Despite this, the match ends cleanly as Mandylor wipes out Griff with a flying tackle for the three count and the Saw stable's first victory over the Bundy Family.

Tune in soon for more exciting UWF action, including Dennis Rodman v. Frank Stallone in a grudge match. Until then, we'll see you at the matches

The Universal Wrestling Federation...[glow=red,2,300][glow=red,2,300]"What the Universe Is Watching..."[/glow][/glow]

[WTIC]

Emma looks cute in that wrestling outfit, LOL!

Paris with Kaufman? What a pair!

Peggy rules! You go, girl!

The SAW guys are sharp! (Okay that's a bad pun!)

Fun card as usual, Bocky!

[bockwinkle99]

U53--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation.

It's THE FURY HOUR!


Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Los Angeles, California

"Fury Hour" airs on SportsChannel America (3.7 rating)

Craig DeGeorge (hold by hold); Mike Golic (color); Mike Greenberg, Capt. Lou Albano, Herb Abrams (interviews)

1. "Wild Thing" Steve Ray d. the Black Knight by submission


Interview: Mike Greenberg interviews Frank Stallone backstage and greets him with the news that Dennis Rodman, his scheduled opponent tonight, has an injury and will not be able to wrestle. Stallone: "That rotten commie (expletive deleted). Does he think that will save him from the @$$ kicking he's going to get from me? Rodman, if you don't got the guts to wrestle me, don't come back to the UWF, OK? Gutless (expletive deleted)."

2. Cactus Jack p. "Cutie Pie" Louie Spicolli

Spicolli, in his UWF debut, bites off more than he can chew as Cactus batters him in and out of the ring. Even after the bell, Cactus hasn't had enough and shoves referee Billy Silverman out of the ring to continue the beating. From out of nowhere, though, races out Battle Kat. The high flyer mounts the ringpost and executes a brutal moonsault onto Jack on the floor of the Reseda. As order is restored, Cactus is carried out and screaming...but smiling also.

Promo: Laura San Giacomo. Seemingly in some kind of a daze, Laura says she is clearing the way for her "master" to come, and for that she "must have the gold". Anna Nicole Smith did not take her seriously, she says, and paid. Now it is time for others in the UWF to pay their tribute "in pain".

Craig and Golic shrug and wonder what she's talking about as they move to the next match.

3. Kevin Federline p. "The Real American" Frank Stallone

K-Fed, Rodman's substitute, is really no challenge for Frank--until he grabs referee Ryan Stiles around the knees and distracts him. This allows Dennis Rodman to appear, nail Frank with a chair shot, and allow Federline to score the victory.

Rodman to Greeny: "I just wanted to show to all you people how (expletive deleted) this (expletive...oh, you get the idea) is. Man, he's dumber that that other (ex...do I really have to?) Karl Malone was back in the NBA."


]CAPT LOU'S CORNER: Tonya Harding.

Tonya is furious and quickly takes the interview away from the Cap'n. "Do I know who it was that came after me in my title match(aired on last week's Fury Hour)? Uh, hello? Duh...it was Kelly Bundy. I may not know a lot, but I do know that. I also know this, Kelly and Peg, what comes around, goes around. I am going to add the Womens' TV title to my collection of gold. I mean, I'm a world class athlete, skater and boxer, and what are you two? Nothin'."

4. Cowboy Bob Orton (w/John Tolos) p. Jose Luis Rivera

It's an easy victory for "the Ace" and his new manager, the "Golden Greek" John Tolos, who tells Herb post match that he is "the greatest manager in the world today".

Promo: Costas Mandaylor and Tobin Bell

Mandaylor thanks Tobin for getting him the title shot against Griff (to air next week on Fury Hour), but Bell denies anything to do with it. [color=Yellow]"You, Mr. Mandaylor, had the difficult assignment. I merely played the game that the Bundys created. As you can see, Bundy Family, I am an expert game player. I do not need to create them. I plan to stand back and enjoy the humiliation when you lose the game that you created."
[/color]
5. UWF tag team champions the Bruiser and the Crusher d. the Blackhearts to retain the titles.

Bruiser takes advantage of an argument between the Demon and referee Scott Dickenson, proceeds to beat down the monster and pin him as the Crusher holds off Vampire Warrior.

In back, Greeny has the Blackhearts' manager and UWF Womens champion Luna Vachon. Luna: "My men were cheated! Those two barroom drunks attacked them from behind! If I were out there, they would have the titles! Bruiser, Crusher, this is by no means over!" She then heads to the ring, pausing to scream in Greeny's face and forcing him to lean against the wall and grab his chest in fear.

6. UWF Women's Champion Luna Vachon p. Allison Royal in a non-title match.

Vachon easily wipes out Allison, who puts up little resistance.

7. Don 'the Rock' Muraco b. UWF Champion Steve 'Dr. Death' Williams by disqualification. Williams retains the title.

The match is back and forth until frustration sets in for the champion. Unable to stop the oncoming Rock, he resorts to using the UWF title belt as a weapon, snatching it away from Herb at ringside and clocking Muraco with it. The crowd boos and throws garbage at him as he returns to the dressing room.

Be sure to tune in next time for more great UWF action on the Fury Hour. Scheduled to appear next time are Sarah Silverman and Laura San Giacomo in a one on one match, also Tina Fey will face Elvira in the latest chapter of their feud. Andy Kaufman, Nikolai Volkoff and Nikita Koloff (the Russians) will be here as well, and the main event will be Griff defending his TV title against Costas Mandaylor. Until then, we'll see you at the matches.

The UWF...WHAT THE UNIVERSE IS WATCHING...

[bockwinkle99]

I think PhotoBucket is on to me and not letting me use ANY of my saved graphics (or maybe I'm paranoid..it's possible...lol). For the time being, I'm back to no art and just colors. I hope this doesn't, in any way, distract from your enjoyment of the UWF.

[WTIC]

K-Fat... K-Fed rocks!

Cactus cleans house!

Orton kickin' it Old School!

Luna is totally wild!

Williams is lucky to still have the Belt!

Yeah, PB can be trouble sometimes, great fight card though!

[neilybob]

I've always liked your fed bocky.

[KellyMonro007]

Pure craziness! I dig it!

[bockwinkle99]

U55--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation

It's the...

FURY HOUR!

Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Los Angeles, California

Fury Hour airs on SportsChannel America--3.0 rating

Herb Abrams (booker); Craig DeGeorge (play by play); Mike Golic (color); Mike Greenberg, Captain Lou Albano (interviews)

**) The night opens on a somber note as a moment of silence and a memorial ten count is observed for Macho Man Randy Savage. After the bell, the crowd chants "Randy...Randy...Randy..." as the Fury Hour goes into it's first commercial break...

1. Laura San Giacomo d. Sarah Silverman, submission

[ *) Sarah holds her own early, but in the end the devilish Laura is too much and forces Sarah to submit in the Nadine Cross-Face. Unlike Laura's last victim, however, Sarah is released before she is injured.

**) First ad for the UWF Blackjack Brawl is aired. The Brawl will be in three weeks live from Las Vegas.

INTERVIEW: Mike Greenberg interviews Laura San Giacomo and informs her that Anna Nicole Smith wants a rematch against her at the Blackjack Brawl.

Laura: "Is she insane? Does she not realize the powers that are massing against her? The darkness has shown its mercy to you, Anna Nicole, and that mercy is limited. Risk it again and it will destroy you for good!"

IN-RING: Herb Abrams is joined in the ring by Andy Kaufman and Paris Hilton. Andy issues a challenge to the women in the crowd to a match. The stakes: One million dollars (of Paris' money, of course) should they win cleanly. When all he gets are boos and catcalls, he berates the women in the crowd until Herb grabs the house mic away. He's about to cut to commercial when Drew Barrymore races out and accepts the challenge.

2. Drew Barrymore b. Andy Kaufman (w/Paris Hilton) by DQ


*)Drew pummells Andy about the ring until he bails out and screams at referee Colin Mochrie, who ignores him and counts. Drew leaves the ring to go after him some more but Paris jumps her from behind. Mochrie calls for the bell as Paris is subjected to a judo flip to the arena floor before she and Andy beat a hasty retreat.

PROMO: "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff announces that he is on his way to the UWF. Craig DeGeorge confirms that Orndorff will appear on the Fury Hour in two weeks.

]3. The Russians v. Tommy Angel and Corporal Kirshner ends in a double countout

*)It doesn't take long for this bout to spill out onto the ballroom floor. The four men brawl around the ring and down the entrance way, using whatever they can find on each other. Referee Jesse Hernandez somehow manages to restore order and get the Russians back to the dressing rooms.

INTERVIEW: Greeny has Drew Barrymore backstage. Barrymore: "I should have known that Andy Kaufman didn't have the guts to take me on face to face. I guess he just made me mad is all. And then to have Paris Hilton of all people jump me from behind? Oh, no. How about you bring your Brat Pack to Las Vegas, Andy? The three of you against me and two of my best friends, Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu. Do you have the guts, Andy?"


CAPTAIN LOU'S CORNER: This week's guest is UWF Heavyweight Champion, "Dr. Death" Steve Williams

Dr. Death: "I hit the Hawaiian Paunch with the belt to give him a taste of what I am capable of. The world is turning, Muraco, but soon yours will be standing still. Now, Herb Abrams wants to put me in something called a title belt match. That means the title belt can be used in any way. I suggest you get used to that belt going upside your cocoanut skull, because that's the closest you'll ever get to it! Bet on it!"

4. Elvira (w/Emma Watson) p. Tina Fey (w/Amy Poehler)


*) It doesn't take long for Watson and Poehler to get involved, keeping ref Kevin James on his toes, and in fact he gets distracted by the ringside brawl and doesn't see Fey cover Elvira. When she moves to get his attention, Elvira strikes from behind, setting her up for the tombstone piledriver and the three.

5. Battle Kat p. Spitball Patterson

IN-RING: Tonya Harding calls out the woman who attacked her last week and challenges her to a match. The masked woman, introduced as Lady X, comes to the ring and ref Ryan Stiles calls for the bell.

6. Tonya Harding p. Lady X


Tonya quickly overcomes the mystery woman and drops her with some 'sweet chin music' for the pin. Tonya then pulls her to her feet and rips off the mask to reveal...

Nancy Kerrigan!

As Stiles tries to restrain Tonya, Peg Bundy slides into the ring and attacks Tonya, who fights back until Nancy gets a metal pipe from under the ring and levels Tonya with it. Bundy and Kerrigan stomp Tonya until fellow Smoking Gun mates Todd Bridges and Danny Bonaduce make the save.

7. Costas Mandylor (w/Tobin Bell) b. TV Champion Griff (w/Jefferson D'Arcy) by disqualification.

*) The match is even until Jefferson gets into the ring, followed by Tobin Bell. Referee Mochrie gets between the managers and manages to get them removed from ringside. Mandylor starts to get the advantage until Griff gets himself deliberately disqualfied by taking off his shoe and braining Mandylor with it. As Mochrie raises Mandylor's hand, Griff struts around the ring...until UWF president Herb Abrams enters the ring. Abrams: "Griff, your actions tonight make me sick! The people wanted a clean finish and you denied them of that just to keep your hands on the title. Now, while I can't do anything about it tonight, I can give them what they want at the Blackjack Brawl. You and Costas Mandylor will meet in Las Vegas in a match to a finish...and just to make sure that the Bundy Family doesn't get involved, or anyone else...let's put it in a cage!"

Tune in next time for more exciting UWF action. The main event will be Iceman King Parsons against the Ace, Cowboy Bob Orton. Also scheduled to appear are UWF Champion Dr. Death Steve Williams, Dennis Rodman, Adorable Adrian Adonis, Wild Thing Steve Ray and other great wrestlers. Until next time, we'll see you at the matches.

[glow=red,2,300]The Universal Wrestling Federation[/glow]...what the Universe is Watching...

RIP, Randy Savage...

[neilybob]

Excellent card from top to bottom Bockwinkle. ;D

[WTIC]

Laura is a tough competitor!

Drew over Andy is about right!

Russians are always hard to beat!

Elvira is still hot!

Battle Kat with a surprise win!

Tonya is a battler!

Costas wants the Belt!

[bockwinkle99]

U56--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation.

It's [glow=red,2,300]THE FURY HOUR!![/glow]

Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Los Angeles, California

Fury Hour airs on SportsChannel America...2.6 TV rating

Craig DeGeorge and Mike Golic at ringside. Mike Greenberg and Capt. Lou Albano, interviews. Herb Abrams, promoter.

1. Adorable Adrian Adonis b. the Black Knight by disqualification

*) This begins as a usual squash match...until the appearance of "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff! Adonis throws Knight out of the ring and invites Orndorff in. Mr. Wonderful instantly obliges and the two men begin trading blows. As ref Jesse Hernandez is distracted trying to separate them, the Black Knight re-enters the ring with a chair and waffles the Adorable One with it. When Hernandez tries to grab the chair away, he gets a chair shot, too. Orndorff and Knight put the boots to Adonis until wrestlers come out and pull them out of the ring. In back, Mike Greenberg catches up to Mr. Wonderful, who explains himself.

Orndorff: "Greeny, I've been waiting years to do that. You ask why I did what I just did? Well, let me tell you something. Adrian Adonis, that fancy freak, he did the one thing that a man can never forgive. He questioned the manhood of Mr. Wonderful! He got in the ring with me in a dress! He wiggled and shook...it made me sick! I kicked his butt then, but certain people in New York stopped me from doing the one thing I wanted to do, and that was break this...this freak's neck and drive him out of professional wrestling! Well, now, I have the chance, Greeny. At Blackjack Brawl, I get the chance to take care of Adrian Adonis once and for all. Do yourself a favor, Adonis! Walk away from wrestling now! Before Las Vegas! Because after it, you'll never walk again!"

VIDEO FLASHBACK: Footage of last week's TV main event is shown, including Herb Abrams' announcement of a cage match between TV Champion Griff and Costas Mandylor. This is followed by a videotaped promo by Griff, Al Bundy and Jefferson D'Arcy.

BUNDY: "Costas Mandylor, you should consider yourself lucky that we've decided to grant you a title shot. You see, I had wanted to drag you into the ring and teach you a lesson that only a sports legend such as myself can. But Griff said, "Hold on, Al. Don't dirty your hands with this nobody. Let me." I tried to talk him out of it, but my pal, my best friend, good ol' Griff, he wouldn't hear of it. So, there you go, Mandy! I feel sorry for you, buddy. Oh, and if your corpse of a manager decides to try to play some kind of game, Jefferson here will handle him."

D'ARCY: "Me?"

Back to the ring...

2. The Blackhearts (w/Luna Vachon) d. the Russians

*) In an upset, the men from "Your Worst Nightmare" upend the powerful Russians to get a title shot at Blackjack Brawl against UWF Tag Team Champions the Bruiser and the Crusher. Vampire Warrior scores the win by pinfall over Nikolai Volkoff as Luna and the Demon deal with Nikita Koloff.

3. UWF Champion "Dr. Death" Steve Williams p. Ricki Attaki

*) Squash match.

CAPT. LOU'S CORNER: Frank Stallone is Lou's guest today.

Lou: "So, tell me, Frankie, baby, have you found your tag team partner for Blackjack Brawl against Dennis Rodman and Corn-Fed (Kevin 'K-Fed' Federline)?"

Stallone: "I sure have, Captain. As you know, I have a lot of connections in Hollywood, and I got a lot of calls asking me to pick them. I thought about it, though, and realized I didn't have to use any connection except blood. So, tonight, I present my tag team partner, my brother, Sylvester Stallone!"

Sly comes out and shakes Lou's hand before speaking. "Yo, Rodman, Federline. Did you think that you could cross a Stallone and not threaten to bring the full fury of the family down on you? If you did, you're as stupid as you look. When Frank asked for my help, I said sure. You see, I've always wanted to take a shot at pro wrestling, ever since 'Paradise Alley', but I've never gotten a chance. Oh, sure, I took on Hulk Hogan in Rocky 3, but that was a movie. This is real life. And to paraphrase my friend, Hulk, 'whatcha gonna do, Rodzilla and K-Fed, when Stallone-mania runs wild on you?'"

4. Dennis 'Rodzilla' Rodman p. Nacho Libre

*) The masked Mexican does his best, but he's run into a Rodman full of purpose. Determined to make a statement, Rodzilla makes the match last much longer than it needs to, much to the frustration of referee Kevin James, who finally executes a fast count on an obviously beaten Nacho to stop the beating.

BACKSTAGE: Greeny finds Adrian Adonis being tended by doctors. Adonis pushes the medics away and takes the mic.

Adonis: "Orndorff, do you think this is going to stop me? This is nothing! Growing up in New York City, this (referencing the bandaged cut on his forehead) was just another Tuesday for me! If I wasn't bleeding when the sun went down, I considered it a wasted day! Violence is a banquet on which I feast, Orndorff. Or maybe, since we're headed for Las Vegas, maybe I should say, violence is an all you can eat buffet on which I feast. Either way, Paula...yes, I said 'Paula'...you seem to forget who I was before Vince put that stupid dress on me. I was a champion in the WWF. I was a champion in the AWA. I've been a champion everywhere in the world! And I'll be a champion here in the UWF. But first, I need to teach you a lesson, Paula. A history lesson. So, get ready, Mr. 'Wonderful' (Adonis adds air quotes here). Seven hearts, and three faces, and that's all I have to say."

5. 'Wild Thing' Steve Ray p. 'the Star of David' Barry Horowitz

*) Squash match.

6. Candi Devine p. Rockin' Robin

*) In what may be the match of the year so far in the UWF, Devine keeps her hold of the top contender's slot by surviving a tough and, at times, brutal match against a determined Robin. Devine will take on UWF Womens' champion Luna Vachon at Blackjack Brawl.

7. Cowboy Bob Orton (w/John Tolos) p. Iceman King Parsons

*) To prevent another all out brawl, Herb Abrams bans Colonel DeBeers and Billy Jack Haynes from ringside. It doesn't matter, though, because Tolos is there and the Golden Greek becomes the deciding factor with a foreign object to the Iceman's skull.

Tune in next time for more great UWF action, and don't forget, the Blackjack Brawl, live from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, coming soon. Until then, we'll see you at the matches.

[glow=red,2,300]The UWF...What the Universe is Watching...[/glow]

[WTIC]

Adonis found a way to win there!

Good to see the Russians lose!

Not familiar with Ricki.

Horowitz rules, too bad he lost though!

Devine wrestled devinely there!

Orton can't do much more to win than that!

[neilybob]

Rocking Robin eh ?

[bockwinkle99]

U57--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation

It's the FURY HOUR!!

Matches taped at the Reseda Country Club in Reseda, California

(Fury Hour airs on SportsChannel America--2.1 rating)

(Craig DeGeorge, play by play; Mike Golic, color; Capt. Lou Albano, Mike Greenberg, interviews; Herb Abrams, promoter/booker/in ring interviews)

1. "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff p. "Cutie Pie" Louie Spicolli

In the post match with Herb, Orndorff repeats his vow to drive Adrian Adonis out of the UWF, using a slur that is bleeped out by network censors. From out of nowhere, Adonis appears! Herb gets between the two, shouting "Wait till Las Vegas, wait till Las Vegas!" Mr. Wonderful backs out of the ring pointing and leveling threats at Adrian as referee Jesse Hernandez pushes him to the dressing room.

*) Backstage: Mike Greenberg has the Sock it to Me Girls, Judy Carne and Go-Go Goldie, who will face That '70s Team for the Universal Womens Tag Team Championship in tonight's main event. Goldie takes the mic first and rambles barely coherent until Judy takes the stick and bottom lines it:

"Tonight, we're gonna sock it to That '70's Team and take the belts home."

2. Elvira & Emma Watson d. the Party of Two

Referee Colin Mochrie stops the bout with Lacey Chabert trapped in Elvira's Anaconda Lock and unresponsive. Emma ko's Jennifer Love Hewitt with her wand when she tries to rescue her.

*) After the commercial break, Herb Abrams is joined in ring by Andy Kaufman, who makes his usual announcement of "$5000 or marriage" for any woman in the arena. Out of the locker room comes Lucy Liu who accepts the challenge for the money.

3. Lucy Liu p. Andy Kaufman

Lucy nails Andy with the Crescent Kick and knocks him out as Nicole Richie races out to the ring. She climbs into the ring and is nailed by a Crescent Kick of her own. Both are down and out as Lucy pins Andy.

**)CAPT. LOU'S CORNER: Tonight's guest is Tobin Bell, who announces a special challenger to Peg Bundy for the UWF Womens' TV title at Blackjack Brawl in Las Vegas, and brings out Shawnee Smith. Smith: "You know what I'm gonna do to you, Peg? Huh, huh? I'm gonna hurt you, Peg, you and that little tramp of a daughter, too. Why? Because I like to hurt people!" As she cackles away, Tobin turns to Lou: "Captain, it's time to play a game."

4. Laura San Giacomo p. Kari "the Mythbuster" Byron

Laura scores a pinfall victory but she doesn't seem satisfied and tries to put Byron in the Crossface after the bell. Referee Mochrie restrains her and Herb re-enters the ring, this time as promoter, and threatens to take Laura's match against Anna Nicole Smith in Vegas away if she doesn't leave the ring immediately. She agrees.

5. Tommy Angel & Corporal Kirshner d. Los Conquistadors in a squash match

6. Al Bundy b. Danny Glover by countout

Al throws Danny through the ropes near the end of the match, but referee Ryan Stiles gets distracted when Jefferson D'Arcy climbs into the ring and challenges Tobin Bell to get in the ring (the usual sticking your chin out and pointing at it routine). When Tobin enters and Ryan gets between them, Al piledrives Danny to the arena floor, then returns to the ring to hustle Jefferson from the ring and get Stiles to start his count. He does so, reaches ten and raises Al's hand as the crowd boos and throws paper cups into the ring.

7. The Sock it to Me Girls d. That '70's Team to win the UWF Womens' Tag Team Championship

Mila Kunis rolls up Goldie for a pin but she kicks out at two. Kunis disputes the count with referee Kevin James and argues. Goldie grabs Mila, executes a "Sock it to me" DDT on Kunis and wins the belt.

Tune in next time for the BLACKJACK BRAWL live from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Nevada. Here's the complete card:

1. UWF Womens TV Championship: Peg Bundy v. Shawnee Smith

2. UWF Tag Team Championship: The Bruiser and the Crusher v. the Blackhearts

3. Tonya Harding v. Nancy Kerrigan in a "pole on a pole" match
(A metal pipe will hang from a pole in one corner and can be used in any way by either women during the match)

4. UWF Women's Championship: Luna Vachon v. Candy Devine

5. "Mr. Wondeful" Paul Orndorff v. "Adorable" Adrian Adonis

6. Laura San Giacomo v. Anna Nicole Smith

7. Elvira and Emma Watson v. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler

8. Dennis Rodman and Kevin Federline v. Frank and Sylvester Stallone

9. The Angels (Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu) v. Andy Kaufman and the Brat Pack (Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie)

10. Billy Jack Haynes and Iceman King Parsons v. Colonel DeBeers and Cowboy Bob Orton

11. UWF TV Championship/Steel Cage match: Griff v. Costas Mandylor

12. UWF Universal Championship: Steve "Dr. Death" Williams v. Don "the Rock" Muraco in a title belt match. (The title belt, much like the metal pipe in the Pole on a Pole Match, can be used in any way by either man)

Until then, we'll see you at the matches

The UWF..What the Universe Is Watching...

[WTIC]

Orndorff can't wait!

E&E are a good team!

Liu is pretty hot, oh yeah!

Way to go, Laura!

Angel & K breezed through that match!

Al Bundy will take a count-out win for sure!

Mila lost the Belts for her team?? Noooooo!

[neilybob]

Nicely done Bockie.

[bockwinkle99]

U58--Bockwinkle99 presents Herb Abrams' Universal Wrestling Federation

From the MGM Grand Hotel Ballroom in Las Vegas, Nevada, the UWF presents...

[glow=red,2,300]THE BLACKJACK BRAWL!
[glow=red,2,300][/glow]
[/glow]
PPV telecast aired live

Craig DeGeorge and Mike Golic at ringside; Herb Abrams (booker and ring announcer)

1. Shawnee Smith(w/Tobin Bell) p. UWF Womens' TV Champion Peg Bundy(w/Marcy Darcy) to win the title.

Bundy is caught off guard by the newcomer, and Marcy Darcy tries to interfere to help, but only gets the thumb from referee Ryan Styles. Shawnee scores the victory (and the first title for SAW) with a flying bodypress.

2. The Blackhearts(w/Luna Vachon) b. UWF Tag Team Champions the Bruiser and the Crusher by DQ (Bruiser and Crusher retain the titles)


The Bruiser breaks up a pin by Vampire Warrior by attacking him. Referee Billy Silverman moves in but Bruiser sends him flying with a right hand to earn the dq. The teams fight their way back to the locker rooms as referees struggle to restore order.

3. Tonya Harding p. Nancy Kerrigan in a "pole on a pole" match

Tonya, still sporting a knee brace, gets hold of the pole and ko's Nancy with it to earn the pin and a bit of revenge.

4. UWF Womens Champion Luna Vachon p. Candi Devine to retain the title.

Despite the crowd support, Candi isn't much of a match for the vicious Luna and falls victim to the Luna Eclipse.

5. Laura San Giacomo p. Anna Nicole Smith

Despite the victory, Laura locks Anna Nicole in the Crossface anyway, releasing briefly to throw referee Kevin James out of the ring. From the crowd jumps Jenny McCarthy, who tackles Laura and wrestles with her until referees Colin Mochrie, Ryan Styles and Mark Curtis pull the women apart.

6. "Adorable" Adrian Adonis p. "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff

Orndorff is furious and comes close to punching referee Jesse Hernandez but thinks better of it and releases his collar.

7. Elvira and Emma Watson d. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler

The SNL anchors do their best but in the end the women from the dark side are too much and Elvira finishes Amy off with the tombstone piledriver

8. Frank and Sylvester Stallone d. Kevin Federline and Dennis Rodman

The Stallones work as a well oiled machine to take it to K-Fed and Rodzilla. Frank p. Federline for the victory.

9. The Angels (Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz and Lucy Liu) b. Andy Kaufman and the Brat Pack (Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie) by DQ

Ref Kevin James (recovered from his trip over the top rope courtesy of Laura San Giacomo) disqualifies Paris for a blatant choke, but the bell doesn't end the melee. Eventually, Andy and the Brats retreat.

10. Col. DeBeers and Cowboy Bob Orton d. Billy Jack Haynes and Iceman King Parsons

Orton makes Parsons tap out in an Indian deathlock.

11. UWF TV Champion Griff v. Costas Mandylor's cage match is ruled a no contest.

Mandylor is having his way with Griff until from under the ring crawls "good ol' Bob Rooney", who immediately whacks Costas in the head with a shoe. The Bundy allies pummel Costas, ramming his head into the ringpost, as Tobin Bell and Danny Glover struggle to open the cage. They finally do so and chase Griff and Rooney off but the damage is done.

12. UWF Champion "Dr. Death" Steve Williams p. Don "The Rock" Muraco in a title belt match to retain the title.

After the bell, Dr. Death is confronted by King Kong Brody, who issues a challenge to Williams. Williams, claiming that the legendary Brody "hasn't earned it", turns his back on a fuming Brody. King Kong loses control and beats Dr. Death down, throwing him through a ringside table as a fitting exclamation point for the evening.

Remember to keep up with all the UWF action on the Fury Hour!

Until then, we'll see you at the matches.

The Universal Wrestling Federation...What the Universe is Watching!