JamieOD's Springfield Nuclear Wrestling

[steelthunder814]

I loved the Barney/Cletus match bro...too sweet

[GalactiKing]

Go, Scorpio....my favorite guy in the fed.

[JamieOD]

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Meltdown 4

Bumblebee Man Vs Prof. Frink
Akira Vs Grampa Simpson

Tag Team Tournament Semi-Final Match
Springfield Police Force Vs The Mafia

2-on-1 Handicap Match
Duffman & Disco Stu Vs Drederick Tatum

Gil Vs Mayor Quimby
Apu Nahasapeemapetalan Vs Ned Flanders
Principal Skinner Vs Homer Simpson

Jail Cell Match
Chief Wiggum Vs Fat Tony

Tag Team Tournament Semi-Final
The Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team Vs The Terwilliger Brothers

"Heroes & Villains" Three Way Dance
Comic Book Guy Vs Rainier Wolfcastle Vs Dr. Colossus

Springfield Title Match
(champ) Snake Vs Groundskeeper Willie

The fireworks go off as the theme music plays over the speakers. The crowd is excited as we go to our announcing team, Kent Brockman and Troy MClure.

Kent Brockman: Tonight will be a landmark night.

Troy McClure: That's true, Kent. Hi, I'm Troy McClure, you may remember me from such announcing jobs like the Carolina Amateur Curling Championships, the Paint Drying Grand Prix and the Foxy Boxing Mud-Slap-A-Thon. An impressive card is on tonight. Chief Wiggum challenges Fat Tony in a Jail Cell match.

Kent Brockman: We have the semi-finals of our tag team tournament.

Troy McClure: Gil and Mayor Quimby finally face off one on one.

Kent Brockman: And of course, our main event. Snake and Groundskeeper Willie for the industry's biggest prize...the SNW Springfield Championship! Let's get straight to the action!

Mr. Burns music is played over the speakers.

Troy McClure: Or maybe not. Here comes the boss!

Mr. Burns walks down to the ring accompanied by Waylen Smithers.

Sideshow Mel: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome the owner of Springfield Nuclear Wrestling, being accompanied to the ring by Waylen Smithers...Mr. Burns!

Mr. Burns is given a mic by Smithers.

Mr. Burns: Ahoy ahoy. Nothing makes my heart beat more than a thrilling photovision matinee in which all the proceeds go to me. I guess I should be thanking you all for coming along...but I won't. For you see, I still take all the revenue made from merchandise and also the vast majority of the wrestlers' paychecks regardless of how many people show up. Anyway, it is not just the money that has me excited, but also the competetive atmosphere in the air tonight. But first, a correction to tonight's card. We were originally supposed to have cops and robbers fighting in a Jail Cell match. However, most of the participants were already booked in the duos tournament. I will not cancel the match, because I want to see violence as much as you do. So the Jail Cell match will go ahead, but it will only consist of Chief Wiggum and Fat Tony.

Kent Brockman: We already pointed that out, you old fart.

Troy McClure: Yeah, pay attention, you pile of bone dust.

Mr. Burns: Let's start the show by directing your attention down to Kent and Troy at the Announcing table.

He looks down at Kent and Troy, who are sitting at ringside in the Announce Table.

Troy McClure: Uh oh.

Kent Brockman: He must have heard us.

Troy McClure: Kent, you didn't do anything to upset him recently, did you?

Kent Brockman: (worried) No.

Troy McClure: (nervous) Well I sure didn't! (nervous laugh) Nope, I didn't scratch his car or nothing. Nothing at all.

Mr. Burns: Do not worry gentlemen. Let me just be the first to tell you about the next match. It will be a Spanish Announce Table match!

Troy McClure: But we don't have a Spanish Announce table...or even a Spanish Announce team for that matter.

Mr. Burns: Really? What's the Spanish words for one, two, three?

Kent Brockman (thinks): Easy. Uno, dos, tres. So where's the Spanish Announce Table?

Mr. Burns: You're sitting in it. The only way to win this match is to put your opponent through our "Spanish Announce Table" here. Enjoy.

Mr. Burns leaves the ring, laughing. Smithers follows him.

Troy McClure: Look what your Spanish has gotton us into!

Kent Brockman: That was Spanish? I thought I was speaking Italian as a bluff.

Spanish Announce Table Match
Bumblebee Man Vs Prof. Frink
Although the aim of the match was to put your opponent through the 'Spanish' Announce Table outside the ring, the match spent a lot of time in the ring. Frink was thrown into the corner. He dodged a Butt Bump which sent Bumblebee Man out onto the floor. Frink hit a Somersault Plancha to the outside.

Kent Brockman: They're starting to get close.

Troy McClure: I'm throwing you right at them if they come near me.

Frink dropped Bumblebee Man onto the floor with a Russian Leg Sweep. Bumblebee Man fought back with a Waistlock Suplex and then threw Frink headfirst into the corner post. He throws Frink onto the table.

Troy McClure: (scared) That's it, I'm out! Are you with me, Kent?

Kent Brockman: (in the crowd) I'm way ahead of you!

Bumblebee Man attempted to give Frink a Reverse DDT onto the table but Frink fought out of it. He was then able to do the EUREKA from the table onto the floor! The move took both men out for a short period of time. Frink was first back to his feet and gave Bumblebee Man the SHINING PROFESSOR. Frink threw Bumblebee Man onto the table and climbed up himself. Frink attempted to Choke slam his opponent but was knocked onto his back. Bumblebee Man applied a Reverse Figure Four. Frink was tapping out but the match couldn't be stopped. Bumblebee Man climbed up to the top turnbuckle and performed the BEE SPLASH. However, Frink rolled off of the table, leaving the bee to crash right through it.

Winner: Professor Frink

Kent Brockman: Is it safe to come back yet?

Troy McClure: I think so. The bee guy is lying on what's left of our table.

Akira Vs Grampa Simpson
Grampa took control for almost the entire match, wearing down Akira with moves that would make his finisher more effective. A Shinbreaker and several Chop Blocks to the leg made it very difficult for Akira to stay standing. However, when Grampa caught one of Akira's kicks he was caught with an Enzuigiri. Akira did the HAPPY SUMO DDT which was enough to get the pin.
Winner: Akira

Troy McClure: Get set, because we continue our tag team tournament as two teams with a heated history head to the ring!

Tag Team Tournament Semi-Final Match
Springfield Police Force Vs The Mafia
As the cops headed down to the ring, The Mafia again attempted to ambush them. This time, however, Sgt. Eddie and Sgt. Lou saw this coming and caught the Mafia off guard themselves. Sgt. Eddie and Louie brawled into the ring as their partners went to their respective corners. Louie was able to overpower Sgt. Eddie and tagged in Legs. A Super Kick grazed off of Eddie's chin but left him open for a Piledriver. Sgt. Lou just stopped the pinfall in time. Sgt. Eddie rolloed out of the way when Legs attempted a Diving Headbutt. Sgt. Lou was tagged in and cleaned house. Louie was tossed out of the ring and Sgt. Lou slammed Legs with a Spinebuster. The Cops hit the BOOK 'EM on Louie to end the match.
Winners: Springfield Police Force

Troy McClure: That's payback for last week! The cops start off the night with one step in the right direction. Now it's up to Chief Wiggum to follow up with the other foot.

Kent Brockman: Coming up next, a Two-on-One Handicap match between Duffman and Disco Stu against Drederick Tatum. This match has been requested by Duffman and Stu after Tatum interrupted their dance contest last week and gave them both a beating.

Highlights from last week show Drederick Tatum interrupting a wrestling match turned dance contest between Disco Stu and Duffman. He knocked Duffman out with the KNOCKOUT PUNCH and hit the K.O. BOMB on Disco Stu.

2-on-1 Handicap Match
Duffman & Disco Stu Vs Drederick Tatum
The match mainly focused on Tatum against Duffman as Disco Stu was unable to get the better of his opponent on his own. Duffman was in control until a Discus Punch knocked him silly. Tatum went for a pin after a Belly-To-Belly Suplex but was stopped but Disco Stu. Duffman was able to do a Duff Valley Driver before tagging in Disco Stu. A Knee Smash sent Tatum into the ropes but he returned the favour with a spear. Duffman climbed up top for a sneak attack but was caught in midair with a KNOCKOUT PUNCH. Disco Stu landed on his head after a T-Bone Suplex from Tatum, which was followed by the three count.
Winner: Drederick Tatum

An SNW Replay shows the rivalry between Gil and Mayor Quimby over the last few weeks. On Meltdown 2, Gil pinned Quimby with the GILHAMMER during an 8-Man Elimination match for the Channel 6 championship. Later that week on Bar Brawl, Gil once again pinned Quimby after the Spear and the GILHAMMER during a Tag Team match. Last week on Meltdown, Gil was scheduled to face Quimby one-on-one. However, Quimby was unable to wrestle due to his "busy schedule" as Mayor. Instead, Quimby put Drederick Tatum as his replacement. Tatum beat Gil that night and after the match, Mayor Quimby ran down and attacked Gil. He gave him the VOTE QUIMBY and the LANDSLIDE LOCK, forcing Gil to tap out.

Gil Vs Mayor Quimby
Gil showed some backbone when he pushed Quimby at the beginning of the match. Before Quimby could push him back, he got slapped in the face. Before Quimby could react to that, Gil slapped him again, clearly getting more and more encouragement with every slap. Quimby threw Gil to the ropes but received a Yakuza Kick. Gil Power Slammed Quimby and forced him out of the ring for a breather. Gil leaned through the ropes but got gouged in the eyes. Quimby then hit a Vertical Suplex, which hurt Gil badly. Gaining confidence of his own, Quimby picked Gil up, only to be Body Slammed.

Kent Brockman: Hey, he was faking it!

Troy McClure: (depressed) That's the story of my life.

Gil charged uimby but got a three consecutive German Suplexes. Amazingly he managed to kick out. Quimby immediately applied the LANDSLIDE LOCK but Gil reached the ropes. Quimby used the five count to his advantage, only letting go before the ref reached five. Quimby ran to the ropes but got hit with a Spear. Gil covered Quimby but he kicked out easily. Quimby recovered and hit the VOTE QUIMBY but Gil got his feet onto the ropes.

Troy McClure: How the hell is Gil not dead yet?

Quimby threw Gil out of the ring but Gil held onto the ropes. He dropped Quimby's neck onto the top rope and climbed back in. He really tried to take out Quimby hitting four consecutive Yakuza Kicks. With his last ounce of strength he was able to do the GILHAMMER to win.
Winner: Gil

Kent Brockman: Gil beats Quimby again!

Troy McClure: The Mayor of Springfield has failed again to beat the eternal loser. How embarrassing.

Gil attempts to celebrate but slumps to the ground. He is feeling so weak he has to crawl to the back. Quimby eventually gets back to his feet and gets jeered at by the fans as he heads out of ringside.

Apu Nahasapeemapetalan Vs Ned Flanders
These two put on quite a show in last week's triple threat match with Groundskeeper Willie. Apu hit a string of moves and quickly gave Ned the KWIK-E-MART KICK but Ned kicked out of the pin. Apu, seeking to finish this quickly, took out a cup of Squishee under the ring and drank it when Ned and the ref weren't looking. He proceded to do a Squishee Spit to Ned, but it didn't work as well as he hoped. Flanders recovered with a Drop Toe Hold and a Lariat. He went on to deliver several Chops to Apu's chest and followed with a Side Slam. Apu was given a powerful Irish Whip into the corner, where he bounced off of the turnbuckles onto the canvas. Ned finished things off with the BLESSED SUPLEX.
Here's your winner...Ned Flanders!

Principal Skinner Vs Homer Simpson
A suprisingly quick bout as Homer was outmatched. Skinner forced him to tap out to the DETENTION HOLD.
Winner: Principal Skinner

We see the event from last week which leads to our next match. The Mafia easily defeated the Springfield Police Force in a six man tag match after ambushing them. Chief Wiggum made the challenge and the Mafia accepted. As Mr. Burns pointed out earlier, the match has been changed to just Chief Wiggum versus Fat Tony. We see the small cage being wheeled over to what is left of the announce table. The only way to win is to throw your opponent into the cage and lock the door. The loser must spend the week in jail as a forfeit.

Jail Cell Match
Chief Wiggum Vs Fat Tony
The match began in the ring where Wiggum Body Slammed Fat Tony. It must have been a painful landing for the Mafia boss as Wiggum had enough time to climb the top turnbuckle and hit a Police Squad Splash. Fat Tony was whipped into the turnbuckle but botted Wiggum in the face. He climbed to the second rope and gave Wiggum a Sicilian Slice. Wiggum fought back with shots to the stomach and a Headbutt. Fat Tony was left dazed in the corner and received a Corner Splash. Fat Tony slumped to the canvas a rolled out of the ring. Wiggum went to the apron and leapt onto Fat Tony, knocking him into the cage wall. Wiggum proceeded to grind Fat Tony's face against the cage wall. Fat Tony came back with a few punches and slammed Wiggum's head into the cage wall. He opened the cage door and placed Wiggum's head in between, slamming the door into his face! While Fat Tony took his time and gloated to the fans, Wiggum suddnely swung the cage door right back at Fat Tony! Another Headbutt sent Fat Tony slipping into the doorway but he grabbed onto the sides of the cage. Wiggum slammed the cage door into Fat Tony again, this time knocking him into the cage. Wiggum shut the door and the Squeeky-Voiced Teen locks it to end the match.
Winner: Chief Wiggum

Wiggum, Sgt. Lou and Sgt. Eddie wheel the cage holding Fat Tony out of ringside. The camera follows them backstage where the cops walk past Legs and Louie.

Fat Tony: Boys, spring me out!

Louie: Sorry boss, I'd like to, but my arm's hurting and the cops are right in frontof us...well ya know how it is.

Legs: Yeah, boss. Seeya next week!

Chief Wiggum: (to Sgt. Lou & Sgt. Eddie) See what I told you, not everyone in crime is a scumbag. Let's go.

The two laugh as Fat Tony is wheeled out of the studio.

After an advertisement for FOX ("We rule the world, b***h!"), the Terwilliger Brothers are in the ring with Sideshow Bob on the mic.

Sideshow Bob: Ladies and gentlemen, last week we showed complete dominance over two braindead drunks who go by the names of Homer and Barney. Now we face two men who are so delirious, they have the audacity to name themselves as the best tag team in Springfield. Myself and my brother here will prove once again that we are creative geniuses in the art that is professional wrestling. In fact, you should all praise us right now. Would it hurt you imbeciles to just throw a few streamers?

A roll of toilet paper is thrown from the crowd towards Bob, who ducks it.

Sideshow Bob: That is not funny!

Tag Team Tournament Semi-Final
The Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team Vs The Terwilliger Brothers
Carl and Cecil started off the second semi-final. Cecil had the advantage and hit a Leg Drop and an STO. He went for a Chinlock but Carl managed to escape the move and plant Cecil with a DDT. A German Suplex was enough to pin Cecil while Lenny blocked Bob from cutting in.
Winners: Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team

While Carl and Lenny celebrate, a graphic showing an impossible to read playoff tree (leave it up to Prof. Frink to complicate things) shows that the self Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team will face the Springfield Police force in the finals next week.

A video package shows the rivalry between Rainier Wolfcastle, Dr. Colossus and Comic Book Guy. During the first Meltdown, Comic Book Guy, while dressed as a superhero, eliminated Dr. Colossus from the Royal Rumble. The next week, Dr. Colossus attacked Comic Book Guy backstage and slammed a steel chair on Comic Book Guy's head. Later that night, Rainier Wolfcastle defeated Dr. Colossus without too much of a problem. Comic Book Guy ran down to attack Dr. Colossus afterwards and pushed Rainier out of the way. Wolfcastle took this as an insult and attacked both Comic Book Guy and Dr. Colossus, giving Comic Book Guy a Spinebuster and throwing both of them out of the ring.

Kent Brockman: You know, Troy, we have an interesting lineup for the next match.

Troy McClure: That's right, Kent. Comic Book Guy likes to think that he is a superhero. In fact, he believes that his costume is what stores his "super powers" (bend fingers). Dr. Colossus is a genuine super villain, despite the fact he gets caught and arrested on a weekly basis. And Rainier Wolfcastle is best known for playing the ultra-violent action hero, McBain. This is going to be like seeing Batman, Superman and Spiderman fight each other!

Kent Brockman: Except instead of those three we get a movie star, a fat nerd and a weirdo.

"Heroes & Villains" Triple Threat Elimination Match
Comic Book Guy Vs Rainier Wolfcastle Vs Dr. Colossus
While Comic Book Guy walked down for his entrance he was ambushed by Dr. Colossus. The two brawled around ringside before finally entering the ring. Wolfcastle finally made his presence felt when he charged down to the ring and immediatley pinned Dr. Colossus with the MCBAIN BLAST!

Troy McClure: Wow! Rainer Wolfcastle with a vicious Power Bomb which he calls the McBain Blast!

Kent Brockman: And that was just his first move of the night! He waited for Comic Book Guy and Dr. Colossus to waste their energy on each other.

Troy McClure: That's kind of uncharacteristic of Rainier, wouldn't you say?

Kent Brockman: It is, once you think about it. But what easily makes sense is that Dr. Colossus, the "Villain" of the match, has been eliminated! It's now down to Rainier Wolfcastle and Comic Book Guy.

Wolfcastle gave CBC several kicks and punches before hitting a Lariat. He proved to everyone that his Spinebuster from two weeks ago was no fluke as he gave Comic Book Guy a Spinebuster in the middle of the ring. Rainier showed further amazing strength by doing a Running Power Slam and then a McBain Buster. Comic Book Guy had no chance.
Winner: Rainier Wolfcastle

Kent Brockman: The "Action Hero" prevailed!

Troy McClure: Just like in the movies Kent! But not like the comic books. We usually have to wait another few issues before we see him succeed.

After the break, Kent Brockman and Troy McClure hype up our main event.

Kent Brockman: So now we reach our main event. snake makes his first defence of the Springfield championship against Groundskeeper Willie. Expect this to be a humdinger of a fight.

Troy McClure: Let's start this match quick, if we get blood before 11pm I win in the stakes.

Springfield Title Match
(champ) Snake Vs Groundskeeper Willie
Both men showed no fear and went straight at each other. The fight led to the outside as Snake did a Full Nelson Slam onto the floor. He then gave Willie a Pumphandle Slam onto the floor and rolled him in for the pin. Willie kicked out at two. Willie quickly recovered and eventually hit the SCOTTISH BURIAL. Snake managed to kick out. Willie tossed snake over the top rope and followed through. H followed Snake over to the remains of the announce table. Snake grabbed the title belt and clocked Willie in the head with it!

Kent Brockman: Why didn't I think of that?

Troy McClure: He knocked his brains out with that one! Did the ref see that?

Kent Brockman: He did! And he's disqualifying the champ for it!

Troy McClure: Hey, he's bleeding. I get thirty bucks!

Sideshow Mel: Ladies and Gentlemen, here is your winner by disqualification...Groundskeeper Willie! However, the Springfield championship cannot change hands via a disqualification, so your Springfield champion is still Snake!

Kent Brockman: Now that's not right! In theory that means that Snake can just keep getting disqualified so he'll still keep the Springfield title even if he loses!

Troy McClure: Well, what can you do?

While snake was about to leave with a big grin on his face, Mr. Burns comes out to the entrance holding a mic.

Mr. Burns: So Snake, you think you can pull off a quick one against old Monty, eh? Guess again. For you see, these people paid good money to see this match and to see a great ending. Seeing you get yourself disqualified on purpose, while I admire it, is still bad for business. So I am going to restart the match and if you get disqualified again, you will get stripped of the Springfield championship! Ring the damn bell mechanism!

Snake charged back down to Willie to kick him while he was down and throw him head-first into the steel post. Despite this, Willie wouldn't stay down! Both went back into the ring where snake hit another Full Nelson Slam. Willie dodged a Leg Drop and hit Snake with a Running Big Boot. He then performed the LAST FLUSH. The ref counted to three and we know have a new champion!
Winner and new Springfield Champion: Groundskeeper Willie

Troy McClure: Piper be proud, Groundskeeper Willie is our new champion! Party in his shed tonight!

Kent Brockman: Thanks for watching, this is Kent Brockman signing off.

The show ends with Groundskeeper Willie raising the Springfield title high in the air.

[blueraider2]

grounds keeper is the champ saints preserves us mon.

[JamieOD]

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Kid Chaos 4

The Flanders Family Vs Jimbo Jones & Dolph

Milhouse van Houten Vs Database
Uter Vs Wendell Borton
Martin Prince Vs Lewis

Fatal Four Way
Lisa Simpson Vs Francine Vs Jessica Lovejoy Vs Allison Taylor

Alex Whitney & Janey Hagstrom Vs Sherri & Terri

Ralph Wiggum Vs Nelson Muntz
Pepi Vs Hamm

Ladder Match to determine 1st Boys Champion
Kearny Vs Bart Simpson

The Kid Chaos theme music plays over the speakers. Small fireworks (supplied by Bart's confiscated fireworks box in Springfield Elementary) are set off as Kid Chaos begins! We join K.B.B.L. radio hosts, Bill and Marty.

Marty: This is it. We will finally crown our first ever Boys champion tonight. All that is left for Kearny and Bart to do is to climb a ladder and grab the belt to become champion.

Bill: That's not all as we have a Fatal four Way match between some of the top talent in the girls division.

Marty: That's half of the girls division taking part in the match. The winner would definately hold claim to be one of the best in the division. But that's for later. Let's kick things off with a tag team bout. Lately the Bullies have been making their presence felt. Principal Skinner has decided to put them to the test by pitting them against (sniggers) the Flanders Family.

Bill: Our advice to those related to the Flanders is to just switch the station now. But do come back as we want good viewing figures.

Flanders Family Vs Jimbo Jones & Dolph
Rod and Jimbo began the match. Jimbo was feeling so confident he went down to his knees and allowed Rod to have the first strike. While Rod was thinking about what to do, Jimbo suudenly punched him in the gut and laughed. He whipped Rod into the turnbuckle. Rod leapt onto the second turnbuckle and hit a Flying Cross Body on a charging Jimbo. He then let loose with several chops to the chest against his own corner and tagged in Todd. Todd attempted a DDT but Jimbo countered it with a Wedgie! Dolph was tagged in to capitalize on the situation. Todd dodged a Leg Lariat and Victory Rolled Dolph into his corner. Rod was tagged back in where he climbed up top and hit a Double Stomp onto Dolph's back. Dolph rolled over to his corner in agony and tagged in Jimbo. Jimbo laid out Rod with a Running Clothesline and a Bulldog. Todd came in and this time got to DDT Jimbo. He locked on a Sleeper Hold and got Jimbo down to his knees. Jimbo recovered and fought out of the hold. But before he could do anything, Rod hit the CONVERTER but only got a two count. Rod & Todd had Jimbo set up for the SAY YOUR PRAYERS but Dolph finally interrupted when he pulled down the top rope to send Todd topple out of the ring. Dolph was tagged in and knocked Rod down with a Super Kick. Dolph climbed the ropes but Todd was able to get on the apron and grab his ankle. Dolph knocked him off but while this was happening, Rod jumped to the second rope and Dropkicked Dolph out onto the security barrier! The ref began to count out Dolph while Jimbo sized up Rod. Jimbo hit what was sure to be the match winning Spear but the ref never noticed the pin and preceded to count out Dolph!
Winners: Flanders Family

Bill: What? Dolph's been counted out!

Marty: The ref never noticed that Jimbo had Rod pinned. Dolph was the legal man, not Jimbo.

Bill: A big upset to start off the show! I bet the Bullies won't be happy about this.

Milhouse van Houten Vs Database
Milhouse suprised everyone by dominating Database in the opening minutes of the match. A Right Hand and a Knee Lift was very effective and a Reverse DDT really did some damage. However, Database turned things around when he blocked a Top Rope Splash with his knees. Database quickly climbed to the second rope and successfully done a 2nd Rope Leg Drop. Milhouse blocked Database's attempt to slam his head into the turnbuckle. He eblowed Database in the chest several times and climbed the second rope with his back turned away from his opponent. Milhouse then hit Database with a dangerous Reverse Hurracanrana! Database was probably knocked out silly but had enough left to do a Side effect, leaving both boys on the canvas. Both got on their feet at the same time and Milhouse quickly got Database with a School Boy. Database kicked out but Milhouse immediately set him up for the HOUSE EFFECT. Database countered the move into a Crucifix but couldn't pin Milhouse. He could pin him shortly afterwards when hit did the TWISTING DATA for the win.
Winner: Database

After a commercial for Springfield Elementary ("There's no price on education but we need to get money somehow"), we see the Bullies of Jimbo, Dolph and Nelson charge into Principal Skinner's office.

Jimbo: Dude, that was not cool and you know it!

Dolph: That ref was bogus out there!

Skinner: Children, calm down. What happened?

Jimbo: You know for sure that the dork out there cost us our match against Weenie One and Weenie Two. I had Weenie Two pinned but dorkbreath out there decided that we lost for no reason!

Dolph: Actually, you were pinning Weenie One.

Jimbo: It doesn't matter! They're both weenies!

Skinner: Settle down. I see that you are speaking of your match against Rod and Todd Flanders at the beginning of the broadcast. If you are unhappy about it, I will review the tapes and consider setting up a rematch for next week. One other thing, I notice your fourth member is not with you.

Jimbo: Duh! He's preparing for his match tonight by hunting second graders.

Skinner: Well, in the interest of fairness I want his match with Bart Simpson tonight to have a clean finish. So I will make sure that no one will interfere with tonight's main event.

Jimbo: Oh yeah? Who's gonna stop us?

Skinner: Groundskeeper Willie.

Willie is seen in the hallways, moping the floor wjile wearing his newly won Springfield Championship around his waist.

Jimbo: Crud.

Nelson: Oh well. I'm gonna go take my frustrations out on Ralph. Smell ya later!

Uter Vs Wendell Borton
Wendell had complete control as Uter was obviously suffering from a bad stomach ache before the match. Wendell hit the MOTION SICKNESS, but sudenly grabbed onto his stomach and dashed out of the ring

Marty: Is he coming over here?

Bill: Run for it!

Bill and Marty jump out of their seats and run away from the table. Wendell crawls under the table and we hear him vomiting. He looks better when he gets up and back into the ring. Bill and Marty slowly get their headsets back on.

Marty: (sniffs) Oh God, it smells like hazardous waste!

Bill: I don't feel so good...

Marty: No, Bill. Don't!

Bill gets sick under the table.

Marty: Oh dear God!

Wendell stumbles back into the ring. Uter takes advantage and hits a Pumphandle Drop, followed by the UTER DRIVER for a lucky win.

Marty: Can somebody please get a mop?

After the break, we see Groundskeeper Willie wearing his new Springfield title belt, which he won on Meltdown this week. However, he is still doing his day job, cleaning up the vomit behind the Announcers' Table. Bill and Marty are sitting in their seats away from the table. Marty is continously spraying himself with disinfectant.

Martin Prince Vs Lewis
The two put on some nice mat based grappling at the start. Martin tried a cheap shot Lewis with a Left Jab but it was easily blocked. Lewis dropped Martin with a Swinging Neckbreaker. Martin ducked a Roaring Elbow and did a Dragon Suplex. He threw Lewis over the top rope but he landed feet first on the apron. Martin tried to Spear Lewis through the ropes but it was dodged. Lewis then Leg Dropped Martin on the ropes. He pinned MArtin but only got a two count. Martin didn't last much longer as Lewis won the match with the COMPLETE SHOT.
Winner: Lewis

Fatal Four Way
Lisa Simpson Vs Francine Vs Jessica Lovejoy Vs Allison Taylor
This match had all four compete at the same time with the first pinfall or submission ending the match. Lisa tried to inish things quick by applying an A+ Lock on Alison but she escaped the hold. Allison and Jesscia both focused on Lisa until a Flying Cross Body from Allison knocked the two of them down. Francine wasn't hurt by this and threw Jessica out of the ring. She Back Body Dropped Lisa aswell. Allison caught Francine off guard with an Enzuigiri, knocking her out of the ring. Lisa then caught Allison with a Russian Leg Sweep. Jessica returned to the ring and got Lisa in a Tarantula. While this was happening, Francine grabbed Jessica by the hair outside the ring and pulledher to the floor. Allison climbed the top turnbuckle and hit the ATOMIC ALLISON on Lisa. She had Lisa pinned but Francine stopped the count. Allison fought back with a Bulldog. She charged Francine and was almost Bory Slammed. She managed to counter it into a Victory Roll but Francine kicked out. Allison showed some great agility as she rolled out of her pin and into another Victory Roll, this time on Lisa. Lisa kicked out and Allison tried to roll into Jessica, but was stopped with a Super Kick. Lisa tackled Jessica, which sent both girls out of the ring. With the two outside, nobody could stop Francine from winning the match with a Top Rope Senton onto Allison.
Winner: Francine

Alex Whitney & Janey Hagstrom Vs Sherri & Terri
The twin's adavantage of being closely related was the most important factor here as they were able to work better as a team compared to Alex and Janey. Sherri pinned Alex with a Missile Dropkick.
Winners: Sherri & Terri

Ralph Wiggum Vs Nelson Muntz
This was Nelson's chance of getting payback after Ralph eliminated him in the 'Captain's Choice' tag team elimination match from two weeks ago. Nelson was in full bully mode, using such moves as Nuggies, Wedgies and Wet Willies to stay on top. Nelson became more physical with knees and kicks to Ralph's head and back. Ralph hit back with a Chop and a "Whooo" (actually it was more of a "Wheee Whooo Wheee Whooo") and then pinched Nelson's nose. He then lifted Nelson onto his shoulders and done an Airplane Spin. Ralph climbed the top turnbuckle and hit a Flying Axe Handle. He tried another Airplane Spin but Nelson grabbed the rope to stop him. Nelson hit a Double Knee Gutbuster and rolled up Ralph with a School Boy, holding the back of his pants for leverage.
Winner: Nelson Muntz

Marty: Oh come on! He held onto Ralph's pants!

Bill: Well, it goes down in the record books as a win for Nelson.

Marty: We have a record book?

Bill: Well, not really. It's just a copybook we bought from the school shop that I draw doodles in. Look at what I drew earlier, it's a pony racing a cheetah.

Marty: That looks more like a leopard.

Bill: The cheetah?

Marty: No, the pony.

Pepi Vs Hamm
The two losing semi-finallists faced each other in the semi-main event. It was a hard fought bout with several close calls. At one point, Pepi had the strength to lay out Hamm with a Brainbuster. Another point had Hamm almost get the three with a Sitout Jawbreaker. Hamm knocked Pepi to the outside and flew over the top rope with a Somersault Plancha. Hamm missed a Moonsault back in the ring and Pepi finished it with a Tornado DDT.
Winner: Pepi

Marty: We are now at our main event. Bart Simpson and Kearny of the Bullies will take part in one of wrestling's dangerous matches, a Ladder match. But first, let's have a look at how the two got here.

Footage showing highlights of the tournament is played. In the first round:
Dolph defeated Uter with the SWIRLY SPECIAL
Hamm defeated Rod Flanders with the HAMMTON BOMB
Jimbo Jones beat Nelson Muntz with the WEDGIE DDT
Database defeated Todd Flanders with a Top Rope Leg Drop
Pepi defeated Milhouse with the PEPI BOMB
Bart Simpson eliminated Martin Prince with the 5 STAR BART SPLASH
Lewis defeated Ralph Wiggum with the COMPLETE SHOT
Kearny defeated Wendell Borton with a Bully Backbreaker

In the Quarter Finals:
Kearny defeated Dolph with the K-BOMB
Lewis defeated Database with the COMPLETE SHOT
Pepi defeated Jimbo Jones with a La Magistral Cradle
Bart Simpson defeated Hamm with a Split-Legged Moonsault

In the Semi Finals:
Kearny defeated Pepi with a Bully Backbreaker
Bart Simpson defeated Pepi with the Prankster's Delight

Groundskeeper Willie brings down a ladder and places it at ringside. Meanwhile, Principal Skinner hands the Squeeky-Voiced Teen the Boys championship belt to hang up and then joins Bill & Marty for commentary.

Ladder Match to determine 1st Boys Champion
Kearny Vs Bart Simpson
Bart tried to get off on the right foot with a Hurricanrana but Kearny easily caught him and threw him out of the ring. Both boys immediately went towards the ladder. Kearny picked up the ladder while Bart rolled back into the ring. He then performed a Baseball Slide into the ladder, kncoking down Kearny. Bart tried to pick Kearny up but was suddenly Body slammed onto the ladder. Kearny threw both Bart and the ladder into the ring. He hit a Bully Backbreaker to keep Bart down and then set up the ladder. Just as he was climbing, Bart knocked him off with a Spinning Heel Kick to the back. Bart followed up with a Cherry Bomb and a Split-Legged Moonsault. An attempt to climb the ladder was halted when Kearny grabbed him and done an Atomic Drop, knocking down the ladder during the process. Kearny hit the K-BOMB but spent so much time trying to set the ladder up properly that Bart soon caught up with him on top. At first it looked like Kearny was trying to give a Bully Backbreaker from the top of the ladder, but Bart wriggled out of place and knocked Kearny to the canvas. Rather than reach for the belt, Bart hit the 5 STAR BART SPASH from the ladder!

Bill: The 5 Star Bart Splash! That was a hell of a move!

Skinner: Watch your language!

Bill: (ashamed) Yes, sir. It won't happen again, sir.

Kearny made the fatal mistake of rolling out of the ring to recover as Bart, although hurting from his big move, was able to climb the ladder and reach for the belt to become the champion.
Winner and new Boys Champion: Bart Simpson

Bart slides down the ladder with his new belt as Skinner walks in and grudgingly congratulates Bart for his achievemnet. Skinner approaches for a handshake and Bart looks as if he will accept it. But of course he swipes his hand away at the last second.

Bart: Psycke!

Bart laughs as Skinner is left looking foolish. Outside the ring Kearny limps away from ringside.

Marty: A hell of a lot of credit must go to these two Boys for an outstanding match!

Bill: (annoyed) Hey! Why do you get to say hell and I can't?

Marty: Because I'm more popular than you.

Bill: Pfft. Yeah right!

Marty: I am!

Bill: Are not!

Marty: Are too!

Bill: Are not!

Marty: Are too!

Bill: Are not!

Marty: Are too!

As Bill and Marty continue to argue, we end the show with Bart celebrating his title win with most of the Kids Divison coming down to congratulate him.

[JamieOD]

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Bar Brawl 4

Duff Challenge
Duffman Vs ? ? ?

Dr. Hibbert Vs The Sea Captain
Larry Burns Vs Capital City Goofball

Barney Gumble & Moe Szyslak Vs Apu & Sanjay Nahasapeemapetalan

Otto Mann Vs Jasper
Superintendant Chalmers Vs Jacques

Fatal Four Way
The Rich Texan Vs Kirk van Houten Vs Waylon Smithers Vs Homer Simpson

The Bar Brawl theme is played as we head into Moe's Tavern for another episode of Bar Brawl! The camera pans around the bar, showing many familiar faces of Springfield. Homer, Barney, Krusty, Dr. Nick, Gil, the Sea Captain and Akira are sitting at the counter, while Moe is serving behind it. As usual, we're joined by KBBL radio DJs, Bill and Marty.

Bill: And now it's time for Bar Brawl! Hello, and welcome to Moe's Tavern, home of Snotty Rag Sundays and fresh, warm, green beer on St. Patrick's Day. We are just coming out of an eventful week here in the SNW and boy, wasn't that a doosy, Marty?

Marty: Sure was, Bill. We have a new Springifeld champion! Groundskeeper Willie won the controversial match against Snake to become the new champ. Also, Bart Simpson became the Boys champion over in Kid Chaos.

Bill: Which we also announce for, which makes it very important. But enough about that, for tonight we have an explosive main event! A Fatal Four Way will close off the show.

Marty: But first, let's get to business. We're starting tonight off with the Duff Challenge!

Duff Challenge
Duffman Vs ? ? ?
Duffman's opponent is...Dr. Colossus!

Marty: Look who it is, 'The Evil Doctor' known only as Dr. Colossus!

Bill: 'The Evil Doctor'? Is that the best we can come up with for a nickname?

Marty: Yes, our creative board sucks. Now remember, if Dr. Colossus wins this match he gets a truckload of Duff Beer.

Duffman oozed confidence at the start, thrusting his hips and generally out-wrestling his opponent. He countered a Samoan Drop into a Reverse Suplex but Dr. Colossus surprised everyone by landing on his feet and then do a Hangman's Neckbreaker. He then whipped Duffman into the ropes and took him to the canvas with a Tilt-O-Whirl Power Slam. Rather than go for the pin, Dr. Colossus instead chose to go outside the ring and grab a steel chair.

Comic Book Guy: Stand back! There's a Comic Book coming through!

Suddenly Comic Book Guy, dressed in his superhero costume, runs down to the ring and attacks Dr. Colossus!

Bill: It's Comic Book Guy! Why is he attacking Dr. Colossus?

Marty: He thinks he is a superhero. He's trying to stop any wrong doing by his evil nemesis, Dr. Colossus.

Bill: And let's not forget that neither man defeated each other during the "Heroes & Villains" Triple Threat on Meltdown last monday. Rainier Wolfcastle beat both of them.

Comic Book Guy & Dr. Colossus start brawling around the ring until Comic Book Guy is thrown into the ring post. Duffman Baseball Slides out of the ring but Dt. Colossus dodges it, grabs the steel chair and slams it over Duffman's head!

Marty: Wow! Dr. Colossus just whacked him with the steel chair!

Dr. Colossus rolls Duffman back into thr ring but again gets attacked by Comic Book Guy. As the two trade punches, Duffman perfectly lands an Asai Moonsault onto both men. Duffman pins Dr. Colossus but he kicks out. Both men reenter the ring while Comic Book Guy is still hurt outside. Duffman gives Dr. Colossus a Duff Valley Driver for a two count. He attempts a Hurracanrana but Dr. Colossus counters it with an Evil Colosso-Bomb into the turnbuckles! Dr. Colossus gives Duffman the COLOSSAL EVIL to win the Duff Challenge.
Winner: Dr. Colossus

Bill: And Dr. Colossus wins the Duff Challenge!

Marty: That means he wins the free beer!

Dr. Colossus gives a loud, evil laugh as he walks out of Moe's Tavern and towards the Duff truck while Comic Book Guy reenters the ring with a look of vengeance in his eyes. Dr. Colossus gets into the truck and drives off, laughing maniacaly.

Dr. Hibbert Vs The Sea Captain
The Sea Captain ducks under a Clothesline and knocks Dr. Hibbert into the bottom turnbuckle with a Shoulder Block. He follows up with some Mudhole Stomps. He hit the SHIPWRECK but Dr. Hibbert got a foot on the ropes. The Sea Captain continued the match with a Fall Away Slam and more Mudhole Stomps. Dr. Hibbert fought back when he ducked a Clothesline and kncoked down the Sea Captain with a Flying Shoulder Block. He added two Fist Drops to hurt the Sea Captain some more. He almost got the Sea Captain to submit to the Chiropractor but he let go of the hold and Yakuza Kicked him in the back of the head instead. The Sea Captain almost got pinned after the SPINE SURGERY but he got a foot on the ropes. The Sea Captain soon took control with a Fall Away slam and a Side Headlock. He then hit a big Corner Splash which took the wind out of Dr. Hibbert. Another set of Mudhole Stomps were soon stopped when Dr. Hibbert grabbed a hold of the Sea Captain's foot, got back up and drove him to the mat with a Saito Suplex. He charged the Sea Captain but was suddenly on the recieving end of the SHIPWRECK. The Sea Captain got the three count to win a hard fought match.
Winner: The Sea Captain

Bill: Coming up next we have the de...

Larry Burns walks into view holding a half drunk mug of beer.

Larry Burns: Hey fellas, mind if I sit with you for the next match?

Marty: Sure thing.

Bill: Er...you can't. Your wrestling in the next match.

Larry: Oh sorry about that, I just figured me and my new pals here would just relax and drink a few brews.

Bill: New pals?

Larry: Yeah. There's you two and the skinny guy behind me.

The Capital City Goofball stand behind Larry Burns.

Goofball: Hey guys, what's going on?

Bill: Wait, wait, wait. You two are facing each other next in your debuts for the SNW. Why are you spending time hanging out with each other instead of preparing for the match?

Larry Burns: We're just having fun, that's all. (to Goofball) Let's go, shorty.

Goofball: Sure thing. Let's knock it out of the park.

The Goofball honks his nose before heading to the ring while Larry Burns grabs a mic.

Larry Burns: Hey everyone, since we've got such a lovely bunch of alcoholic misfits in the house tonight, let's put everything on my dad's tab so eveyone can enjoy the beer while we wrestle!

The crowd cheers as we get into our next match.

Larry Burns Vs Capital City Goofball
The two were in good spirits at the start, messing about instead of seriously trying t win the match. The Goofball knocked Larry down with a Clothesline and then squashed him with a Senton. He then hit a Baseball Slide while Larry lied on the bottom turnbuckle. The Goofball easily won the match with a Splash from the top turnbuckle.
Winner: Capital City Goofball

Afterwards, the two shake hands as Larry brings in two mugs of beer into the ring. They both drink the beer, with the goofball drinking it through his large nose.

Barney Gumble & Moe Szyslak Vs Apu & Sanjay Nahasapeemapetalan
Sanjay Nahasapeemapetalan makes his SNW debut in this match as the Channel 6 champion, Moe Syzslak and Apu started off. The two traded jabs and kicks respectively. Moe Irish Whipped Apu into the ropes but was caught with a Handspring Back Elbow. Moe blocked Apu's Body Kicks and unleashed a Flurry Of Fists, forcing Apu back into his counter to tag in Sanjay. Barney was tagged in and he almost dropped Sanjay on his head with a poorly done German Suplex. His Exploder Suplex afterwards was performed much better. Sanjay was thrown to the turnbuckle but he leapt over a Charging Barney and rolled him up for a two count. Sanjay and Apu tried to finish the match with a TWO FOR ONE SALE but Sanjay couldn't lift Barney up for the move. Moe came in to knock the two back and Barney recovered to tag him in. Moe gave Sanjay the Over The Counter but Sanjay tagged in Apu before Moe had a chance to pin him. Apu done a Brainbuster and went for the pin but Barney stopped him. Sanjay knocked tackled Barney out of the ring but wound up outside aswell. Moe ducked an Enzuigiri from Apu, who still landed on his foot. Moe caught Apu off guard with a Kidney Popper and then made him give up to a Camel Clutch.
Winners: Barney Gumble & Moe Syzslak

Otto Mann Vs Jasper
There was quite a generation gap in this next bout. Jasper won the match when he blocked the Splash from the top rope with his knees and then hit Otto with his WALKING STICK.
Winner: Jasper

Superintendant Chalmers Vs Jacques
Jacques tag team upset with Kirk van Houten against the Holy Crusaders last week must have been helpful with the ladies, but he appeared alone and focused for this match. Chalmers himself was also intent on winning this match. The two traded moves until Jacques dodged a Dropkick. His DDT attempt was countered into a Back Drop Driver. Chalmers continued putting the pressure on Jacques until a Back Body Drop was countered into an Armbar. Jacques continued hitting painful moves such as a Fisherman's Suplex, a Backbreaker and a Full Nelson Slam but he couldn't keep Chalmers down. However, a second full Nelson Slam kept Chalmers down long enough for Jacques to hit a ONE NIGHT STAND to end the match in his favour.
Winner: Jacques

Marty: We're moments away from our main event. Wer'e going to have a chaotic end to the night with a Fatal Four Way. Remember, hardcore rules are used during Bar Brawl, so this match is going to get out of control.

Fatal Four Way
The Rich Texan Vs Kirk van Houten Vs Waylon Smithers Vs Homer Simpson
Smithers tried to end the match quickly when he knocked out Kirk with a Spinning Heel Kick. Homer then flattened Smithers with a Lou Thesz Press. Homer was unable to Back Body Drop the Rich Texan, and got a DDT for his troubles. Homer kicked out of a pin attempt but the Rich Texan was able to lift him up for a Torture Rack. Smithers stopped the hold with a Dropkick and gave the Rich Texan a Saito Suplex while Homer left the ring to get a beer. Homer returned to the ring with beer in his hand and gave Smithers a Big Boot. He pinned smithers with one foot while drinking the beer but Smithers kicked out. Homer gave Smithers a Spinebuster but was blindsided by the Rich Texan. Unfortunately for Homer, he dropped his beer glass which smashed to pieces. The Rich Texan then gave homer the TEXAS-SIZED POWER BOMB onto the shards of glass! Homer had no chance to kick out.
Winner: The Rich Texan

Bill: I just noticed, Kirk's been knocked out since the match began.

Marty: What's your point?

The show ends as the Rich Texan hollars and dances around the ring while Homer is being dragged out by Lenny and Carl.

[steelthunder814]

This is now in my top 5 feds lol...awesome

[JamieOD]

I know it's been a while since I last posted a show. I'm not going to use the typical "I don't have the time" reason/excuse because I am still playing COTG a lot, it's just most of the time has been spent on my GWF fed, creating Chikara bootlegs and adding cards to my COTG desktop (which I wish could be done faster). I've also been watching a lot of Lucha Libre highlight videos on Youtube which is inspiring me to set up a Lucha style fed in some point in the future. Anyway, enough babbling...

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Meltdown 5

Homer Simpson Vs Rev. Lovejoy
Ned Flanders Vs Principal Skinner

Triple Threat Match
Cletus Del Roy Vs Dr. Hibbert Vs Duffman

Lionel Hutz Vs The Sea Captain
Rainier Wolfcastle Vs Drederick Tatum
Apu Nahasapeemapetlan Vs Chief Wiggum

Tag Team Championship Match
Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team Vs Springfield Police Force

Before the intro we are shown a highlight package of last week's Meltdown. Prof. Frink defeated Bumblebee Man in a "Spanish Announce Table Match." Dredrick Tatum defeated Duffman and Disco Stu in a Handicap match. Gil defeated Mayor Quimby, marking the third time Quimby was pinned by him in the SNW. Chief Wiggum defeated Fat Tony in a Jail Cell match. Rainier Wolfcastle defeated both Dr. Colossus and Comic Book Guy in a "Heroes & Villains" Three Way Dance. Carl & Lenny and the Cops advanced to the finals of the tag team tournament at the expense of the Terwilliger Brothers & the Mafia respectively. Finally, Groundskeeper Willie won the Springfield championship from Snake, but not without some controversy as the match was restarted by Mr. Burns after Snake got himself disqualified.

The fireworks go off as the theme music plays over the speakers. The crowd is excited as we go to our announcing team, Kent Brockman and Troy MClure.

Kent Brockman: Last week we crowned a new SNW Springfield champion! Tonight we will have an announcement by Mr. Burns concerning who the No. 1 contender is! I'm Kent Brockman and alongside me as always, is...

Troy McClure: (angry) I can introduce myself! (happy) Hi, I'm Troy McClure! You may remember me from such shows as "Baby Control Cop", "Point Your Own Damn Finger" and "Ask the Idiots!" We have a great show tonight.

Kent Brockman: (unsure) Maybe. The Tag Team championships will finally be crowned tonight. Both teams have struggled but only one will reap the rewards.

Mr. Burns' music is played over the speakers. Mr. Burns, accompanied by Smithers, walks down to the ring. Smithers gets a mic and gives it to Mr. Burns.

Mr. Burns: Ahoy ahoy.

Crowd: Ahoy ahoy!

Mr. Burns: Silence! I wasn't being 'Mr. Popular' just there. I have walked down here tonight to make an announcement regarding the Springfield championship. Let me make myself clear that last week, I restarted the title bout for business reasons. I wouldn't care if Snake vapourised his opponent, as long as the championship was either won or lost and the crwod were convinced to give me more money. Now, with that out of the way, let me get to tonight's main event...

Snake's music is played over the speakers as he rushes into the ring.

Kent Brockman: It's Snake! And he has that mean look in his eye.

Troy McClure: He doesn't look too pleased with seeing Mr. Burns in the ring. If Burns hadn't of interfered, Snake would be coming down to the ring with the Springfield belt around his waist.

Snake goes into the ring and walks over to Mr. Burns. Smithers gets in the way and protects Mr. Burns. Snake looks at the crowd and shrugs. He kicks Smithers in the stomach and gives him a Pumphandle Slam.

Troy McClure: And down goes Smithers!

Snake gets up and stares into Mr. Burns' eyes. Mr. Burns has a smile on his face.

Mr. Burns: I have to tell you Snake, there are some qualities I don't like about you...and there are definately some qualities I do like. You are a no good punk, which I don't like. But you are willing to do whatever it takes to get and to keep what you want, which I do like. The announcement I have is this. We will have a small competition to determine who gets the title shot at the Springfield championship. Tonight, there will be a Fatal 4 Way match. Whoever is defeated in the match will be eliminated. Next week, the three remaining participants will face each other in a Triple Threat match. Again, whoever is defeated will be eliminated from the tournament. Finally, the following week will have the final two wrestlers fighting to get the title shot.

Kent Brockman: That sounds interesting.

Troy McClure: That's sounds more than interesting Kent. That sounds fantastic!

Kent Brockman: Troy, first of all Mr. Burns can't hear you from down here, and second, kissing his butt will not make him forget about you scratching his car last week!

Mr. Burns: Now, tonight will be the Fatal 4 Way. I guess I have to play fair and put you into it because of what happened last week. Also, we will put in...

Mr. Burns takes out a piece of paper and reads it.

Mr. Burns: Let's see here...Gil, Hank Scorpio and Superintendant Chalmers! The reason why you four have been chosen is because each of you have impressed me the last couple of weeks with your performances. Also, to make things more interesting, the match will have no disqualifications! One more thing, to make sure nobody backs off when there is a pin or submission, whoever wins the match will pick the stipulation for the Triple Threat match next week! That is all, you may go now.

Kent Brockman: Mr. Burns really has things set up! A tournament between Snake, Gil, Hank Scorpio and Superintendant Chalmers and a winner gets a shot at the Springfield title!

Troy McClure: And the first round will be a No Disqualification Fatal 4 Way match tonight!

Homer Simpson Vs Rev. Lovejoy
Homer almost had Rev. Lovejoy out immediately with a Bearhug. Lovejoy showed some life by pounding his way out of the hold. Lovejoy slipped out of a Power Slam attempt and hit a Corkscrew Elbow Smash. He showed some surprising strength when he gave Homer the SAVING GRACE but Homer kicked out. Homer was whipped into the turnbuckle but Rev. Lovejoy charge was just like running into a brick wall. Homer knock Lovejoy down and hit a HOMER DROP for the win.
Winner: Homer Simpson

Ned Flanders Vs Principal Skinner
The match went back and forth with Ned dodging a Drop Toe Hold only for Skinner to block some chops and catch him off guard with an Enzuigiri. The two traded chops until Falnders done a Jawbreaker. Skinner was left in pain after a Flying Axe Handle to the back. Ned done an Ace Crusher but Skinner kicked out of the pin. Skinner was whipped into the turnbuckle but he leaptfrogged over Flanders to lock in the DETENTION HOLD. Ned was already at the ropes so Skinner had to let go. However, he blocked a Clothesline and done another DETENTION HOLD, this time forcing Ned to tap.
Winner: Principal Skinner

Triple Threat Match
Cletus Del Roy Vs Dr. Hibbert Vs Duffman
Dr. Hibbert and Duffman easily removed Cletus from the ring with a Double Back Body Drop over the top ropes. Dr. Hibbert knocked Duffman down with a Shoulder Block. Cletus rushed back into the ring only to get a nasty Saito Suplex. Duffman threw Dr. Hibbert out of the ring and planted Cletus with a Duff Valley Driver. Duffman hit the DUFF BLOCKBUSTER on Cletus but Dr. Hibbert stopped the count. The two brawled until Cletus interefered and threw Dr. Hibbert out of the ring. Duffman took advantage of the situation and hit a Shining Wizard on Cletus for the win.
Winner: Duffman

We go to a commercial break for Krusty-O's cereal ("Not part of a nutritious breakfast, but who cares?"). When we come back, we see Duffman walking down the hall, with a big grin on his face. Moe walks over to Duffman with his Channel 6 title belt around his waist.

Moe: Hey Duffman, how was the match?

Duffman: Duffman has the stuff you cannot get enough!

Moe: (laughs) Good one. Listen, I just heard about the Springfield tournament thing, and it made me come up with an idea for Bar Brawl.

Duffman: Really?

Moe: Yeah. You know the Duff Challenge you have every week?

Duffman: Oh yeah! You have to be strong enough to get that sweet Duff!

Duffman snaps his fingers and his music suddenly starts playing. Duffman dances to the song while Moe continues.

Moe: Well, listen to this. This Saturday on Bar Brawl we will have the Duff Challenge Free-For-All! All through the night, you will have to compete in the Duff Challenge all night against whoever wants to win it! All they need is to have one of those annoying squeeky-voiced geeks with them and then anything goes! Hardcore rules and the match will go on all through the show! And get this, the match only ends at the end of the show. That means that there could be several people walking away with the truck load of beer! What do you think?

The music and dancing comes to a halt as Duffman is left stunned by the announcement.

Duffman: Er...Duffman...Free-For-All...Hardcore...

Moe: Great! I knew you would like it. See ya Saturday!

Duffman stands in place, scared.

Duffman: (sighs) Duffman should have been a dentist.

Kent Brockman: This will be great! The Duff Challenge Free-For-All this Saturday on Bar Brawl!

Troy McClure: Hey, I might enter.

Kent Brockman: Why?

Troy McClure: Why? Because Duffman will be beaten to a pulp by the time I come down! But then again, I do have my alcohol problems. Better just stick to wine.

Moe continues to walk down the hall and bumps into Fat Tony.

Moe: Hey Fat Tony, how was the slammer this week?

Fat Tony: I am in no mood this evening to joke around, Moe. You have a debt to pay us and time is running thin.

Moe: Alright, alright I'll pay you the money soon.

Fat Tony: If you do not have the money I am sure we can arrange for another form of payment.

Fat Tony points at Moe's Channel 6 title belt.

Moe: Nuh-uh pal, the only way you'll get this belt off me is by pulling it away from my cold, dead hands.

Fat Tony: That can be arranged.

Moe: No way, if you want this belt you have to beat me in the ring.

Fat Tony: Then it's settled, the debt is called off but I get a itle shot next week. Keep that belt in good condition, because I always want my possessions to be in mint condition.

Lionel Hutz Vs The Sea Captain
The Sea Captain should have had the match won but Lionel pushed him into the ref. He then slammed the Sea Captain over the head with his briefcase while the ref was down and easily got the pinfall. After the match, Lionel helps the ref back to his feet and hands him his business card before leaving the ring.
Winner: Lionel Hutz

Backstage Arnie Pie is abou to interview Drederick Tatum.

Arnie Pie: Drederick Tatum, what are your thoughts on your upcoming match against Rainier Wolfcastle?

Before Drederick can answer, his manager Lucius Sweet interrupts.

Lucius Sweet: All questions aimed towards my client here will be answered by myself from now on, good sir. The answer is that my prize fighter has conquered the boxing world, the prison world and soon the grilling world. As for his opponent tonight, Rainier Wolfcastle is a charade, a phoney if you will. He may seem all high and might but the truth is he requires stuntmen to do his work. The men he fought these past few weeks are nothing but caricatures and inferior 'athletes'. Tonight, the prize fighter will prove why he is big money. This interview is over.

Rainier Wolfcastle Vs Drederick Tatum (w/ Lucious Sweet)
The match was filled with power moves and slams as the two tried to finish off each other in the most powerful ways possible. Punches, Power Slams, Headbutts, Suplexes of several kinds and Spinebusters were not enough for either two to be beaten. Tatum was thrown to the ropes and taken down with a Spear. Wolfcastle wowed the crowd with the MCBAIN BLAST but Lucious Sweet interfered. He was tossed into the ring but Tatum tackled Wolfcastle through the ropes. The two continued brawling and even took out the Squeeky-Voiced Teen! Another teen came down to officiate the match only to be knocked out aswell! A third came down, but rather than risk his life he chose the sensible decision. He tells Ring Announcer Sideshow Mel the result.

Sideshow Mel: Ladies and Gentlemen, the SNW officials have decide to end the match with a Double Disqualification! There is no winner.

Kent Brockman: These two better watch their tempers. The decision must have been made when the two kept on knocking out our refs!

Troy McClure: I don't think they should stop this. We should let them fight.

Kent Brockman: I don't think anyone here can stop these two.

Finally several SNW wrestlers seperate and hold back Wolfcastle and Tatum.

Troyn McClure: This isn't over by a long shot.

Apu Nahasapeemapetlan Vs Chief Wiggum
The match was unfortunately quick with Wiggum knocking Apu down with a Headbuut and then hitting the WIGGUM SLAM to finish it.
Winner: Chief Wiggum

After the break, Troy and Kent are about to hype the tag team main event until Groundskeeper Willie's music is played over the speakers. The Springfield champ walks down to ringside down to the announcer's table. He grabs a steel chair, places it beside the table and sits down on it.

Troy McClure: Hey, don't ignore us you rude pig!

Kent Brockman: Don't provoke him, Troy.

No DQ Fatal 4 Way No.1 Contender Tournament Match
Snake Vs Gil Vs Hank Scorpio Vs Superintendant Chalmers
There were plenty of weapons available in this match and many were used. Snake Gorilla Pressed Chalmers out of the ring. Gil tried to play the sneaky backstabber all throughout the match, teaming with the other three at certain times only to try and roll them up afterwards. The plan backfired when Chalmers, Snake and Scorpio all decided to gang up on Gil. Gil was left battered by trash cans and Singapore Canes until Snake hit him with the SNAKEBITE. Chalmers and Scorpio caught on and stopped Snake from getting the win. Scorpio gave Snake a Dragon Suplex outside the ring. Back inside Gil someho recovered from the gang's assault and soon got the better of Chalmers. Just when Gil was about to hit a Spear, Scorpio rolled into the ring and caught Gil with the WORLD DOMINATION. Chalmers cracked a steel chair on Scorpio's back. Scorpio wisely rolld out of the ring, leaving Chalmers alone with Gil. Chalmers put Gil away with no problem with the SUPERINTENDANT SLAM.
Winner: Superintendant Chalmers

Kent Brockman: Chalmers wins the match!

Troy McClure: And he pinned Gil. That means Gil is eliminated from the tournament!

Groundskeeper Willie suddenly gets off of his seat and grabs a shovel from under the ring. Snake, who was unfortunately nearby, gets hit over the head with the shovel! Willie then grabs Scorpio and Choke Slams him to the floor!

Kent Brockman: Groundskeeper Willie is just tearing through everyone!

Willie rolls into the ring but Chalmers was waiting for him. Chalmers had the advantage and was about to go for the SUPERINTENDANT SLAM but Willie countered it with the LAST FLUSH!

Kent Brockman: So next week, it will be a Triple Threat Match between Snake, Hank Scorpio and Superintendant Chalmers.

Troy McClure: And don't forget, Chalmers gets to choose what type of match it will be! If he's still concious, that is.

We have a highlight package for the Tag Team Tournament, showing all of the previous matches.

Quarter Finals
Springfield Police Force defeated the Doctors of Doom when Sgt. Eddie pinned Dr. Hibbert with a Rolling Samoan Drop.
The Mafia defeated S.C.A.T. when Legs pinned Jasper with the WHACKED DROP.
Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team defeated Prime Time when Lenny pinned Krusty thanks to Carl's Spinning Heel Kick.
Terwilliger Brothers defeated Awesome Alcoholics when Sideshow Bob pinned Homer Simpson with a Knee Dribbler.

Semi Finals
Springfield Police Force defeated The Mafia when Sgt. Eddie pinned Louie after the BOOK 'EM double team move.
Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team defeated the Terwilliger Brothers when Carl pinned Cecil Terwilliger with a German Suplex.

Tag Team Championship Match
Self-Proclaimed Springfield's Greatest Tag Team Vs Springfield Police Force
Both teams prepared in their corners as Sideshow Mel introdcued them. Carl and Sgt. Eddie start off. Sgt. Eddie showed that he was prepared to go full force when he took down Carl with a Bicycle Kick. Carl rolled out of the way frm a Leg Drop and followed up with a Corner splash. Lenny is tagged in but Sgt. Lou gets tagged aswell. Sgt. Lou drills Lenny with a Spinebuster. He climbs the top turnbuckle and catches Lenny with a Missile Dropkick. Sgt. Lou starts Stomping on Lenny. Lenny eventually catches Sgt. Lou's foot and gets back to his feet. He then hits a Dropkick on Lou. Lenny whipped Sgt. Lou into the turnbuckle but gets caught with a Big Boot. Carl cahrges in but gets tackled by Eddie. Sgt. Lou does the INTO THE SLAMMER on Lenny, which was enough for the win.
Winners and New Tag Team Champions: Springfield Police Force

Kent Brockman: Law and order prevails!

Troy McClure: I hope this means they will be too drunk to stop me from parking on the road tonight.

Chief Wiggum comes down with a box of donuts to celebrate with Eddie and Lou as the show comes to an end.

[JamieOD]

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Kid Chaos 5

E-Mail Vs Ralph Wiggum
Jimbo Jones Vs Uter
Milhouse van Houten Vs Martin Prince

The Bullies (Dolph & Kearny) Vs The Flanders Family (Rod Flanders & Todd Flanders)

Sherri Vs Francine
Alex Whitney Vs Janey Hagstrom
Jessica Lovejoy Vs Terri
Lisa Simpson Vs Alison Taylor

Non Title Match
Bart Simpson Vs Hamm

Four Way Dance No. 1 Contender Match
Nelson Muntz Vs Database Vs Lewis Vs Pepi

Before the show starts, a highlight package of last week's Kid Chaos is shown. The Flanders Family had a big upset against the Bullies when Rod & Todd defeated Jimbo Jones & Dolph by countout. Database deeated Milhouse van Houten in an evenly-matched contest. Uter defeated Wendell. During the match, Wendell threw up under the Announce Table. Lewis defeated Martin Prince in a spirited match. Francine won a chaotic Girls Fatal 4 Way match. The Twins defeated Alex Whitney and Janey Hagstrom with ease. Nelson Muntz stole a victory from Ralph wiggum. Pepi and Hamm went through a high flying match which Pepi won. The main event was a Ladder match to determine the first Boys championship. Bart Simpson outlasted Kearny and grabbed the belt from the top of the ladder.

The Kid Chaos theme music plays over the speakers. Small fireworks (supplied by Bart's confiscated fireworks box in Springfield Elementary) are set off as Kid Chaos begins! We join K.B.B.L. radio hosts, Bill and Marty.

Bill: What a night we have for you tonight! Last week, Bart was crowned the Boys champion. This week, a Four way Dance has been set up to create the first challenger.

Marty: Welcome to Kid Chaos, here in Springfield Elementary, I'm Marty and the other guy beside me is Bill. You may remember us from such radio stations as K.B.B.L...er, K.B.B.L. and...K.B.B.L.

Bill: Doesn't Troy McClure usually say something like that?

Marty: Yes, I woke up this morning and thought, I should act like someone more successful. Well, who is more successful then a movie actor?

Bill: Yeah, but Troy McClure? That's setting your standards very low.

Marty: Well I don't want to be too successful and have an inflated ego. Now go and get me my soda.

Bill: Marty, you're the one who gets the sodas. Now make mine a lemon and lime.

Marty: ...Yes sir.

The Superfriends' music plays over the speakers. Hamm and Database enter the arena with the newest addition to the Kids Roster, E-Mail.

Bill: Now what a way to start off Kid Chaos! We have the debut of E-Mail taking on the lovable Ralph Wiggum.

Marty: (sipping through a straw) We haven't seen E-Mail in action yet, so who knows what he is capable of.

Bill: Did you just drink my soda?

Marty: Hey, it's a long walk between here and the canteen.

Bill: Get me another soda!

Marty: Why?

Bill: Why? Well because...Ah forget it, I'll go myself!

E-Mail (w/ The Superfriends) Vs Ralph Wiggum
E-Mail threw a punch but Ralph immediately blocked it and thumbs him in the eye. E-Mail goes down after a Flying Axe Handle. Ralph finished the match with the SILLY STUNNER.
Winner: Ralph Wiggum

After the break, Principal Skinner's music is played over the speakers. Skinner walks down to the ring and gets a mic.

Principal Skinner: Attention children. Last week we had a match between two great athletes which shown what our division is all about. The children put on great performances and put their skills to their full potential. So we will continue that theory tonight. I have chosen four children who I believe have what it takes to provide a great challenge for one Bart Simpson. Someone who is a potential challenger for the belt, that is. So tonight, I have set up a Four Way Dance match between Nelson Muntz, Database, Lewis and Pepi. The last boy standing will become the No. 1 contender for Bart's championship.

Marty: Wow, what a main event we have tonight! Too bad we already knew about this.

Bill: (sipping through a straw) Did I miss anything?

Marty: I just mentioned to everyone that we have the Four Way Dance as our main event tonight.

Bill: What? That's my job! First you steal my drink and now you steal my lines!

Skinner: That is not all. I have decided that it is now time to create a championship for the Girls Division. Ever since we began this program, the girls have proved that they are just as fierce and competitive as the boys. So tonight will be the first round in the Girls title tournament. That is all.

Jimbo Jones Vs Uter
Jimbo almost got the win quickly with an Electric Chair Drop but Uter kicked out at the last second. Jimbo didn't wait for him to recover though as he planted Uter with the WEDGIE DDT to end it quickly. Jimbo gave Uter a nuggie in front of the photographer for the school newspaper before he left.
Winner: Jimbo Jones

Milhouse van Houten Vs Martin Prince
Milhouse actually showed some confidence in this match, considering that his opponent was a fellow nerd. He outwrestled Martin and Dropkicked him in the face. Martin tried to fight back but was caught with a Reverse DDT. Martin rolled out of the ring. Milhouse gained support from the crowd and leapt onto the rope for a Springboard Plancha. Unfortunately he slipped and landed face-first onto the apron, smashing his glasses in the process. Martin rolled back into the ring while Milhouse was recovering. The blind Milhouse couldn't find his way back to the ring and was counted out.
Winner: Martin Prince

Footage is shown of the Flanders Family defeating Nelson & Dolph by countout last week. Principal Skinner has set up the match between Rod & Todd against Dolph and his regular partner Kearny.

The Bullies (Dolph & Kearny) Vs The Flanders Family (Rod Flanders & Todd Flanders)
The Bullies immediately attack Rod & Todd but are soon knocked out of the ring with stereo Dropkicks. Both Rod and Todd hit Planchas onto the Bullies. Kearny and Rod roll into the ring to start off. Rod knocks Kearny down with a Dropkick and a Cross Body. Kearny rolls through the pin back onto his feet while still holding onto Rod. He squashes him into the turnbuckles before hitting a Corner Splash. Dolph is tagged in and he gives Rod a nasty Wedgie. He plants Rod with a Tornado DDT but Rod kicks out of the pin. Kearny lifts Rod up on his shoulders. Dolph Springboard Dropkicks Rod off of Kearny's shoulders and onto the mat! Again, Rod kicks out of the pin! Kearny is tagged in and Dolph knocks Todd off of the apron. Kearny hits the K-BOMB but Rod places his foot on the ropes! Frustrated, Kearny gives Rod a horrible Wedgie, one so painful that Rod has no choice but to tap out!
Winners: The Bullies

Todd tries to stop Kearny but is taken out by Dolph's SWIRLY SPECIAL. The Bullies stand triumphant before they leave the ring.

Girls Title Tournament Round 1

Sherri Vs Francine
Sherri went into this match without any fear of fighting dirty. She grabbed Francine by the hair and lapt onto her for a Sleeper Hold. Francine threw Sherri to the canvas and knocked her into the ropes with an Elbow Smash. Sherri fought back with a Dropkick. Francine got back up and gave Sherri a Piledriver. She picked her up onto her shoulders and was about to deliver a Power Slam but Sherri slipped off her. Sherri used the SIAMESE DRAGON but Francine kicked out. Sherri climbed up top and hit a Flying Sunset Flip which only got a two count. Francine threw wild swings and was becoming frustrated. Sherri soon picked Francine apart and pinned her with a second SIAMESE DRAGON for the upset.
Winner: Sherri

Alex Whitney Vs Janey Hagstrom
Alex was in control at the start slapping Janey around the ring. The tables turned though when Janey locked in a Camel Clutch. Janey continued to wear down Alex with a Vertical Suplex and a Backbreaker. She applied a Texas Cloverleaf but Alex reaches the ropes. While Alex was recovering, Janey sprinted up the turnbuckles and landed the SHADOW STOMP to win.
Winner: Janey Hagstrom

Jessica Lovejoy Vs Terri
These two went back and forth with neither giving an inch until Jessica hit a Death Valley Driver to go through.
Winner: Jesscia Lovejoy

After the match, Francine charged down to the ring and gave Terri the NERD KILLER. She then grabs a mic.

Francine: Sherri, I will get my revenge!

Bill: Francine has got mixed up with the twins. She thought Terri was Sherri!

Francine leaves the ring while Terri is checked on by the Squeeky Voiced Teen.

Lisa Simpson vs Allison Taylor
The two academic rivals put on a good show in this match. Lisa attempted a Monkey Flip but allison landed on her feet, bounced off of the second rope and hit a Cross Body onto her opponent. An Enzuigiri seemd to have finished the match but Lisa kicked out. Allison climbed the top turnbuckle and leapt off but Lisa rolled out of the way. When Allison crashed to the mat, Lisa caught her in a rolling pinning combination for the three count.
Winner: Lisa Simpson

Non Title Match
Bart Simpson Vs Hamm
Hamm tried to Body Slam Bart quickly but Bart landed on his feet. He knocks down Hamm with a kick to the head and then does a Cherry Bomb for a two count. Bart hits a Prankster's Delight but does not go for the pin. Instead he racks up a big Kick Combo on Hamm before doing a Springboard Dropkick. Bart finishes off Hamm with a Split-Legged Moonsault, obviously showing that this match was not much of a challenge.
Winner: Bart Simpson

After an advertisement for Buzz Cola Bart is interviewed by Mrs. Krabappel backstage.

Mrs. Krabappel: Bart, what are your thoughts about the Four Way Dance main event?

Bart:Listen, this belt says I'm awesome. I was always awesome and now I have the belt to prove it even more. It doesn't matter who I face because I'm the champ and I am the best. Hey, this is going on television, right?

Mrs. Krabappel: Yes, it is.

Bart: Okay then.

Mrs Krabappel: So there you have it. The champion is not afraid of any challenge that lies ahead. Back to you Bill and Marty.

Bart starts making faces and whoopee cushion noises while Mrs. Krabappel is speaking.

Four Way Dance No. 1 Contender Match
Nelson Muntz Vs Database Vs Lewis Vs Pepi
Database, Lewis and Pepi all start ganging up on Nelson. Nelson pushes all threee back and knees Lewis in the head. He lifts Lewis onto his shoulders and delivers a Double Knee Gutbuster. He pins Lewis for the three count and the elimination.

Marty: Wow, Nelson means business tonight! Lewis is eliminated.

Database doesn't waste any time and tries to take down Nelson. Nelson gives him a Nuggie and throws him onto his buut, sending several kicks to his back. Pepi suddenly kicks Nelson behind his leg and starts to mount some offence. However, his Spinning Headscissors is countered into a Facebuster. Nelson attempts another Double Knee Gutbuster but Pepi slips off and hits him with a European Uppercut. Nelson fights back and hits the Double Knee Gutbuster followed by a Tombstone Piledriver. Database catches Nelson with a Running Forearm and slams his head into the turnbuckle several times. He and Pepi do the Physics In Motion on Nelson. Pepi then hits the PEPI BOMB on Nelson to eliminate him from the match.

Bill: It is finally too much for Nelson to handle. He is out of the match. We are now down to Database and Pepi.

Pepi tried a Spinning Headscissors but was thrown onto the top rope. Database knocks Pepi down with a Missile Dropkick. He hits a Side Effect and prepares to do the TWISTING DATA. However, Pepi counters it into a Tornado DDT. He pins Database and gets the three count.
Winner: Pepi

Bill: It's over! Pepi survives the match and is now the No. 1 contender!

Marty: And I just received word, Bill that the title match will happen next week, right here on Kid Chaos.

Bill: That's all for now. Class has ended. Switch on next week for more Kid Chaos!

[Dustin Neal]

This is great, funny stuff, dude!

[JamieOD]

Springfield Nuclear Wrestling
Bar Brawl 5

Duff Challenge Free-For-All
Duffman Vs ? ? ?

Akira Vs Jacques
Principal Skinner Vs Cletus Del Roy
Dr. Nick Riviera Vs Disco Stu
Grampa Simpson Vs Lionel Hutz

Before the show starts, we see footage from Meltdown this week. Moe is speaking to Duffman about tonight's main event.

Moe: Well, listen to this. This Saturday on Bar Brawl we will have the Duff Challenge Free-For-All! All through the night, you will have to compete in the Duff Challenge all night against whoever wants to win it! All they need is to have one of those annoying squeeky-voiced geeks with them and then anything goes! Hardcore rules and the match will go on all through the show! And get this, the match only ends at the end of the show. That means that there could be several people walking away with the truck load of beer!

(Note: While Moe is speaking, highlights are shown of Duffman's previous Duff Challenges against Gil, Groundskeepr Willie, Akira and Dr. Colossus, just to show what we could be in for. The package ends with Duffman looking very worried.)

The Bar Brawl theme is played as we head into Moe's Tavern for another episode of Bar Brawl! The camera pans around the bar, showing many familiar faces of Springfield. Homer, Barney, Krusty, Dr. Nick, Gil, the Sea Captain and Akira are sitting at the counter, while Moe is serving behind it. As usual, we're joined by KBBL radio DJs, Bill and Marty.

Bill: Tonight we have to warn you, this Bar Brawl might get out of hand!

Marty: A fantastic night we have tonight here in Moe's Tavern! For all throughout the show, we have the Duff Challenge Free-For-All!

Bill: All through the night, Duffman will be hunted down in the bar, where he has to defend his company's honour against whoever wants to win the truck load of Duff Beer!

Duffman's music is played over the speakers. Duffman walks out, dancing down the aisle with a very worried look on his face.

Marty: We're going to find out now! The Duff Challenge Free-For-All is next!

Bill: Here are the rules for the Free-For-All. Anybody from the heavyweight roster is allowed to enter at any time. All he needs is an SNW official (Squeeky-Voiced Teen) to be with him at the time. If you defeat Duffman you win a truck load of beer and take no further part in the match. You can be eliminated if Duffman beats you by pinfall or submission. The match goes on until the end of the show.

Duff Open Challenge Free-For-All
Duffman Vs ? ? ?
Duffman's opponent is...Legs & Louie!

Bill: Oh boy! Duffman's in for some double trouble!

Duffman grabs the ref and throws him into Louie! Duffman runs out of the ring.

Marty: He's high-tailing it out of here!

Legs and Louie roll out of the ring. Legs gets a pool cue from the pool table. Duffman swings the steel chair but Legs dodges it. Legs snaps the pool cue over Duffman's head! Duffman goes down. Legs pins Duffman. 1...2...3! Legs is the first winner of the Duff Challenge!

Bill: And we already have a winner! Legs wins free beer. He is now out for the rest of the match.

Marty: He must be happy.

Legs leaves ringside. Duffman rolls into the ring followed by Louie. Cletus runs down to the ring! He lands several lefts and rights on Duffman. Louie sneaks up on Cletus and gives him a Cobra Clutch Backbreaker. He then drops Duffman onto his head with a Half Nelson Suplex. Louie goes for a pin but it is stopped by Cletus. Louie stomps on Cletus a few times before rolling out of the ring. He throws in a steel chair and a trash can before rolling back in. Louie crakcs Cletus over the head with the steel chair. Duffman suddenly Dropkicks the chair into Louie's face. Befoe he can recover, the Sea Captain charges the ring.

Marty: Land ahoy! Here comes the Sea Captain, just waiting for the booty.

Bill: He's not black, Marty.

The Sea Captain pulls up the apron and drags out a table. He sets it up outside the ring and heads in. He places Duffman onto the top turnbuckle and then points to the table outside.

Bill: This does not look good.

The Sea Captain clmbs up to Duffman at the top but is pushed off to the canvas. Duffman suddenly hits the DUFF BLOCKBUSTER on the Sea Captain for the three count and the elimination.

Bill: And as quick as he got in, Sea Captain is out!

Duffman tries to leave the ring but is blindsided on the apron by Dr. Nick!

Dr. Nick: Hi everybody!

Everyone: Hi Dr. Nick!

Dr. Nick knocks Duffman onto the apron and follows up with an Elbow Drop onto the apron. Cletus knocks Dr. Nick off of the paron and onto the floor. He drags Duffman into the ring but he kicks out of a pin. Louie throws Duffman back into the ring and places him in the Tree of Woe position. Louie and Dr. Nick take turns doing Elbow Drops and Knee Drops onto a defencless Duffman. They signal for Cletus to take his turn. Cletus rallies the crowd behind him and charges towards Duffman, only to get Clotheslined by Louie. While Louie taunts Cletus, Dr. nick gives him a Spinning Neckbreaker. Duffman crawls out of the ring and runs away. Dr. Nick, Louie and Cletus soon chase after him.

Bill: We'll try and catch up with the action during the rest of the show!

Marty: That's if Duffman hasn't ran out of town!

Akira Vs Jacques
Jacques took control early with a Left Jab. Akira was whipped hard into the turnbuckle and was then DDT'd to the mat. Jacques took his time, blowing kisses to the ladies in the crowd. He gave Akira a Backbreaker, bending him over his knee for a submission. Jacques continued to pose for the crowd. Akira then suddenly kicked Jacques in the face to escape the hold. He rained down his signature Karate Chops. Jacques gouged Akira in the eye and gave him a Fisherman's Suplex. He slowly climbed up top, again spending time flirting with the women. Akira nipped up to his feet and hit Jacques with a top rope Hurricanrana. But Akira was too weakened to capitalize as Jacques recovered and hit another Backbreaker. Wasting no time, Jacques climbed the top turnbuckle and hit the ONE NIGHT STAND to end the match.
Winner: Jacques

After the break, Principal Skinner comes out for his match.

Marty: We're not fully sure what's going on here. For those who have just joined us, Principal Skinner's scheduled opponent, Cletus Del Roy, has gotten himself involved in tonight's Duff Challenge Free-For-All. From what we've been told, he is now going to be replaced in this match.

Moe grabs a mic from the bar counter.

Moe: Hey Skinny Boy, we have a slight problem here. Your original opponent tonight was Cletus, but since he's busy with the Free-For-All backstage, we have to get a replacement. Homer, are you ready?

The crowd cheers as Homer, sitting at ringside, finishes his beer.

Bill: Homer? Do you think he means Homer Simpson?

Marty: Well duh!

Principal Skinner Vs Homer Simpson
The two circled each other at the start. Skinner dropped Homer with a Drop toe Hold. He runs to the ropes but gets caught with a Big Bott on the rebound. Homer quickly lands the HOMER DROP but it's only enough for a two count. Homer rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chair. Skinner suddenly Baseball Slides the chair into Homer's face. Homer staggers but stays standing. Skinner attempts to throw Homer into the steel steps nut it is reversed. Homer grabs the steel chair and whacks it over Skinner's back. Skinner soon fights back and slams Homer's head into the corner post. Skinner tries to suplex Homer onto the floor but he is to heavy to hit. Homer bends Skinner over and kicks him fullforce in the face. He then hits a Running Power Bomb through a table!

Marty: Oh my God! Skinner just crashed through the table!

Bill: I think that was the table that was set up during the Free-For-All! Somebody forgot to clear it up when Duffman left.

Homer hits the HOMER DROP on Skinner on the remains of the table. The Squeeky-Voiced Teen counts the pin outside the ring.
Winner: Homer Simpson

Bill: What a win for Homer!

Marty: He wasn't prepared but he came on as a last minute replacement and made the most of it!

Bill: Wait a second! We're getting word about the Free-For-All. It's going on in the parking lot!

We cut over to the parking lot where Duffman, Louie, Cletus and Dr. Nick are brawling with each other. From out of nowhere, Rainier wolfcastle and Superintendant Chalmers assault Duffman!

Bill: Hey! Look who joined the party! McBain is the one person I would not want after me.

The brawl continues as Duffman struggles to fight off everyone. Cletus places a trashcan over Duffman and everyone takes turns beating the hell out of the trashcan! Rainier Wolfcastle flattens Duffman with a Spear while he is still inside the trashcan! Rainier goes for a pin but everyone stomps on him to break it up. Superintendant Chalmers pulls Duffman out of the trashcan and looks like he is helping him to his feet. He suddenly gives Duffman the SUPERINTENDAT SLAM onto the hood of Homer's car! Dr. Nick grabs Duffman by the head and slams it into Homer's windshield. Back in Moe's, Homer is watching the action on the TV with everyone else.

Homer: (laughs) Take that, jerk!

Back in the parking lot Duffman seems to be crawling away from the chaos.

Marty: What does it take for Duffman to survive this?

Bill: I don't...Wait a minute! It's Dr. Colossus! Now he's after Duffman!

Dr. Colossus grabs Duffman by the leg and drags him back into the parking lot. Dr. Nick slams the trash can into Dr. Colossus' back, allowing Duffman to escape with the others soon behind him.

Bill: And away he goes again.

Marty: I guess we have to go on to the next match.

Bill: But is says on the sheet here that Dr. Nick is up next. We just saw him there in the Duff Free-For-All. Does that mean that he's going to be replaced?

Disco Stu comes dancing down to the ring. As he waits for his opponent, Fat Tony storms into the ring and assaults him! The bell rings to signal the new match.

Fat Tony Vs Disco Stu
The match stopped as soon as it started as Fat Tony knocked Disco Stu senseless before Body Slamming him and doing a Sicilian Slice.
Winner: Fat Tony

Fat Tony stares at Moe after the match the counter. Suddenly, Duffman comes running past the crowds! His clothes are torn, his sunglasses is missing a lense and he looks like he's about to drop dead.

Bill: Look who's back!

Duffman climbs over the security fence and into the ring. He walks right into a Clothesline from Fat Tony! Suddenly, Rainier Wolfcastle, Superintendant Chalmers, Dr. Nick and now Gil run down to the ring!

Marty: Gil has entered the Free-For-All!

Bill: But what happened to Louie and Cletus?

Marty: They are probably got too beaten up to continue.

Rainier Wolfcastle sets up a table outside the ring. Gil charges Duffman but gets Back Body Dropped out of the ring and into Wolfcastle! Duffman grabs a Singapore Cane and starts laying waste into anyone near! Duffman lets out a powerful roar but is suddenly caught with a Lungblower. Disco Stu quickly pins Duffman to become the second winner of the Duff Challenge Free-For-All!

Bill: We have another winner!

Louie and Celtus run down to the ring. Everybody starts brawling with each other. Duffman sneaks out of the ring and escapes backstage. Everybody else realises this and start chasing Duffman once again.

Marty: Duffman escapes again! When will he realise that there's nowhere to run?

Grampa Simpson Vs Lionel Hutz
Hutz took his opponent lightly because of the age difference. He whips Grampa into the ropes, something that took a long time to happen, and then knocks him down with a Shoulder Block. Lionel then stomped Grampa several times in the corner. He hit a Butt Bump and quickly pinned Grampa, only getting a two count. Lionel doen an impressive Double Arm Backbreaker but Grampa placed a foot on the ropes. Frustrated, Lionel grabbed his briefcase and hit Grampa over the head with it. That was easily enough for the win.
Winner: Lionel Hutz

Suddenly, Duffman comes running down to the ring! He's being chased by Louie, Cletus, Dr. Nick, Rainier Wolfcastle, Superintendant Chalmers, Fat Tony and Gil! Duffman runs into the ring and right into a BRIEFCASE SHOT from Lionel Hutz! But before Hutz has a chance to pin Duffman, he is Speared by Gil. Louie picks up Duffman and holds him in position. Dr. Nick swings a steel chair but Duffman ducks, leaving Louie to take the shot! Duffman Spinning Heel Kicks the chair into Dr. Nick's face. He pins Dr. Nick to eliminate him from the match.

Bill: A big mistake from Dr. Nick!

Dr. Nick: (dissapointed) Bye-bye everybody.

Everybody: Bye-bye Dr. Nick!

Duffman tries to escape and rolls out of the ring. Unfortunately he bumps into an angry Rainier Wolfcastle. Rainier gives Duffman a Spinebuster through the table!

Marty: That was the table McBain set up earlier on!

Bill: We really have to get people to clear these things up when we stop using them.

Cletus and Lionel Hutz double-team on Rainier to stop him from pinning Duffman. Rainier grabs both of them by the head and smashes them together. Dr. Colossus pulls out a stop sign from under the ring. He bashes Cletus over the head with it.

Marty: These people are willing to do anything for beer.

Bill: Defina...Hang on! Somebody's coming down. It's...Ned Flanders?

Marty: Ned Flanders?!? What the hell is he doing in here?

Flanders does an Ace Crusher on Duffman, who lands on Cletus. The ref counts the pinfall, eliminating Cletus from the match.

Bill: Hey, Cletus is eliminated!

Marty: He was inadvertedly pinned by Duffman!

The ringside continues with the chaos until Rev. Lovejoy somehow sneaks in and pins Duffman!

Marty: What the hell is going on here! First Ned Flanders decides to enter and just now Rev. Lovejoy won the match! What does a Reverend want with beer anyway?!?

Bill: Maybe they're competing for a good cause.

Marty: (sarcastic) Oh yes, nothing means more than good faith than a truck load of beer!

Duffman crawls out of the ring and escapes to the carpark.

Bill: Hey! He's running away!

Marty: After him!

Duffman runs out to the carpark and gets into the Duff van. He locks the doors.

Duffman: Duffman is thankful to get out of here!

Barney: (burps) Hello!

Marty: It's Barney!

Bill: It looks like he's off the wagon again!

Duffman tries to get out of the van but a drunk Barney grabs him and pulls him back in! The van rocks as we hear smashing sounds and a few burps. The door opens and Barney throws Duffman to the outside, where everyone has caught up. Ned Flanders grabs Duffman and gives him the BLESSED SUPLEX. The ref counts the pin. 1...2...Ding ding ding!

Bill: The time's up!

Marty: That's it?

Bill: Yep, the Free-For-All has ended!

Marty: And just when Ned Flanders was about to get the three count!

Ned is being told by the Squeeky-Voiced Teen that he was too late to win. Ned understands and thanks the Teen for telling him. Everyone stops brawling and start to leave, chatting to each other as if nothing happened. Duffman is left alone on the ground.

Duffman: (weak) Duffman should have been a scientist...Oh yeah!

Bill: Well, before we go can we just get a look at the results?

Footage of the pins are shown in order...
Legs pinned Duffman after a pool cue shot.
Duffman pinned The Sea Captain with the DUFF BLOCKBUSTER.
Disco Stu pinned Duffman with a Lungblower.
Duffman pinned Dr. Nick with a Van Daminator.
Duffman pinned Cletus when Ned gave him an Ace Crusher onto Cletus.
Rev. Lovejoy pinned Duffman.
Times Duffman won: 3
Times Duffman lost: 3
6 pinfalls happened during the match.

Bill: That's it for tonight. The bar is closed, see you all next week!

Marty: Why the Hell do we have to clean up this mess?

The show ends.

[johnnyreb]

awesome stuff jamie.