W3 Federation Results

[Werner Mueck]

W3 Show #1

Cameras roll: There is a commotion in the back. Morgoloth and Mo stomp through the backstage area as other wrestlers clear a path for them. Morgoloth is livid while Mo is fast asleep. He storms to Phineus T. Phatback’s office and wrenches the door open without touching the doorknob.

Phineus is having a conversation on the phone. “The new ring has arrived? Outstanding! What? No…. What do you mean? Six sides? Send it back immediately!” He hangs the phone up. “That’s just plain silly….” He notices Morgoloth hyperventilating by the broken door.
“You’re dead, earthling,” Morgoloth screams as he slams the door. The door doesn’t catch and remains open. He continues his rant by berating Phineus for his double crossing regarding the theft of Morgoloth’s interplanetary teleporter, the body merger stipulation, and the fact that it cost him the Ultimate Championship last night at the PPV (see Morgoloth's bio). “Manley stole that belt from me! What are you going to do about it?”

Phineus sidesteps by saying the teleporter isn’t in his possession, Mo must have lost it. He adds that the stipulation was agreed upon, Morgoloth was arrogant enough to think he’d win the match easily. "As for the Flex Manley win last night, blame your brother for that foul up". Phineus, feeling afraid for his safety, tries to sedate Morgoloth by giving him the night off. Morgoloth walks towards the door in a huff. As he does so, Mar Far Jinx pokes his head in the open door. “You wanna see me, sir?”
“Yes, Mar Far, get in here.” Phineus explains that Mar Far’s losing streak is atrocious but his popularity is through the roof. He turns his back to the alien jobber. “I thought I’d give the fans what they want for a change…..” Suddenly, Morgoloth grabs Mar Far and slams him through Phatback’s desk, obliterating it. Jinx lays on the floor apparently knocked out. Phatback continues, back turned to the exiting Morgoloth. “I’ve decided to give you a shot at the Hyper Title. You’ll be opening tonight. ”

W3 OPENING VIDEO

HYPER CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Shiitake Jr. (ch) vs. Mar Far Jinx (+3 fatigue from beating)

Mar Far seems out of it as Shiitake starts the match. Shiitake blows a power move and Mar Far staggers back with a waterwheel suplex. He goes for a quick pin but Shiitake kicks out. Mar Far decides to go for a high risk maneuver but is caught with a foot to the face. Shiitake gets to his feet and is met with a fist and a sitdown hiptoss. The crowd roars. Mar Far flings Shiitake into the ropes and bends for a back drop. Shiitake leapfrogs and rebounds with a flying forearm. Shiitake takes this time to climb the second turnbuckle and play to the crowd. Mar Far pulls him down and misses an elbow drop. Shiitake comes back with a Japanese armdrag, the fungus face plant and finally the Mushroom Driver. Winner: Shiitake Jr.

Camera backstage: Inbred Red sits by the service table and he looks depressed. Chalupacabra walks up and asks him if he’s still upset that there are no bears in W3 for Red to fued with. Inbred Red goes into a sad story about
how he’s always wrestled bears and since his fued with Kid Kodiak ended (loser leaves W3) over six months ago, it has left a bear sized hole in Red’s heart (see Red's bio). From the dark shadows, Johnny Satan appears. Neither Red nor Chalupacabra notice as Satan leans towards Red’s ear. “But Koala Bruce is a bear, isn’t he?” Satan disappears back into the shadows. Red jumps up out of his seat and runs from the screen screaming about Koala Bruce. Chalupacabra shakes his head, “I always thought he was a marsupial….”

SINGLES MATCH
Koala Bruce vs. Buddy Hotpants

While Koala Bruce waves to the crowd, Buddy Hotpants attacks him from behind. He wails on the koala man with an open hand slap, a double knee lift, and then ties him into the turnbuckle. Hotpants goes for the turnbuckle leg splitter but Koala Bruce hops up and sits on the top rope. He jumps off and catches Hotpants with a neckbreaker. He's about to lift Hotpants up when Inbred Red storms the ring yelling "gonna get me a bahr!" Red slides into the ring, clotheslines Koala Bruce and puts him in his infamous Big Bahr Hug. Koala passes out as Buddy Hotpants leaves the ring wondering what just happened. Winner: Koala Bruce (by DQ).

Camera Backstage: Mona Mammeries walks up to Abraham Lincoln X. She asks if ALX has seen Flex. She has some exciting news. In a few weeks, the Women’s Title will be reinstated and there will be a tournament to crown the new champion. ALX stares at her breasts the whole conversation. “I cannot lie,” Honest Abe says, “I don’t know where Manley is and I can’t tear my eyes from your cleavage.” Embarrassed, Mona walks off.

TEN MAN BATTLE ROYAL
Pillchard, Busta Capp, Lil’ Torquemada, Hardcorpse, Inbred Red, Wacky Kabuki, Chalupacabra, Amish Robot, Sturgis Kahn, and Marcus Membrane.

The match starts in chaos. Chalupacabra blindsides Marcus Membran with a jumping dropkick and Marcus is eliminated early. The slime creature is furious and tries to ooze back into the ring. He is escorted to the back. Meanwhile, Wacky Kabuki and Hardcorpse trade blows. The Kabuki wails on the zombie with chops, an elbow smash, and a fierce wedgie. On the other side of the ring, Pillchard levels Busta Capp with a backdrop suplex. Kabuki abandons his fight and steps up to clobber a preoccupied Pillchard. Pillchard is eliminated. Kabuki continues his attack on the downed Busta Capp. Busta comes back with the Driveby Dropkick and attempts to toss Kabuki out. He fails but barely. Nearby, Hardcorpse tries to lift Amish Robot over the ropes. The Robot counters with a pincher jab. The Robot attempts to powerbomb Hardcorpse out of the ring but Hardcorpse hangs on to the top rope.

Lil' Torquemada rakes Inbred Red in the face. Inbred Red pushes Torquemada back. He goes for a ring rope bounce to setup for a clothesline and from out of nowhere, Koala Bruce pulls the rope down. Inbred Red is eliminated. Bruce and Red fight all the way to the back. Torquemada turns his attention to Chalupacabra. After a flurry of moves, a well placed leg lariat sends Torquemada over the top. Meanwhile, Busta Capp and Wacky Kabuki trade blows. Busta slaps Wacky with the Gat Hand and Wacky falls over the ropes to the floor. Amish Robot attacks Sturgis Kahn (who has been leaning in the corner watching the match up until now). The Robot misses a Pensylvania Uppercut. Kahn takes the advantage and flings him to the floor. Busta crosses the ring and attacks Kahn. They trade blows and Kahn tries to eliminate Busta with a running clothesline. He hits but Busta manages to roll back under the bottom rope.

As this is happening, Chalupacabra kicks Hardcorpse in the huevos causing a cloud of dust to appear. Chalupacabra follows with a dropkick and the injured Hardcorpse is eliminated. Sturgis grabs Chalupacabra from behind and Chalupacabra blocks a thumb jab. Chalupacabra swipes at Sturgis with his claws but the big man ignores the blows, picks the luchidore up, and tosses him unceramoniously to the floor. Busta slams into Sturgis hoping to confuse him long enough to eliminate him. They trade blows until Busta is able to reverse a back drop into the sunset flip and crotch punch. He then takes the opportunty to perform his finishing move, the legdrop from the top rope (Ghetto Guillotine). After a few moments, Busta Capp lifts Sturgis Kahn to his feet and dropkicks him over the top. Winner: Busta Capp

Camera Entrance Ramp: Flex Manley walks out clutching his new Ultimate Championship. Mona walks a few steps behind. The crowd erupts. Unknown to Manley, the cheers are for his valet, not for him. Flex and Mona enter the ring and Flex spends a whole fifteen minutes bragging about how great he is and how good a champion he will be. Flex ends his filibuster with a pose down. The crowd roars, mainly because Mona accidently drops Flex’s robes and bends over to pick them up.

TANDEM CHAMPIONSHIP
Octopus Johnson and La Cucaracha (ch) vs. Abraham Lincoln X and Monkey Chan (w/ Eep-Eep)

The match starts with La Cucaracha Grande and Monkey Chan. Chan takes the offense. He attacks the cockroach with multiple chops, monkey flips, and an ensiguiri kick. Cucaracha comes back and tries a short arm dropkick to the knee but Monkey Chan pulls out of it. He decides to tag out to ALX. Abe whips Cucaracha into the turnbuckle. Cucaracha reverses and follows in with a knee smash. The bug then whips ALX into the ropes and smashes him with a body block. He tags out to Octopus Johnson.
Johnson goes for a face plant but ALX manages to shove him away. He clotheslines the octopus man and performs the Lincoln Log Splitter. ALX goes for a backslide pin but Johnson kicks out. ALX tags out. Monkey Chan hits Octopus Johnson with alternating monkey kicks and goes for a 2 count cover. Octopus then blocks a reverse knife's edge. He tags out. Cucaracha botches an arm wringer and Chan turns it into a Monkey Flip. Monkey Chan goes for a running clothesline but Eep-Eep trips him up from ringside. As Monkey Chan recovers in the corner, Cucaracha comes off the tope rope with a corner to corner dropkick. He goes for the cover and ALX isn't quick enough to make the save. Winners: Octopus Johnson and La Cucaracha Grande.

Camera Phineus’ Office: Phineus is talking with Dr. Mutato. “Kaiser, I need a new challenger for Manley. I don’t intend on giving Morgoloth another shot until he calms down and Salacious Rex is in the middle of a fued with Oog.”
Mutato looks a little befuddled. “I just got back from a two week vacation today!” Phatback isn’t concerned with that. Phatback pleads with his friend to make another monster heel for next week’s show. Mutato replies with “I’ll see what I can dig up.”

PPV GRUDGE REMATCH
Salacious Rex vs. Oog

Oog ferociously attacks Salacious Rex as he enters the ring. He wants revenge for the beatdown he took at the PPV (the match ended in a double count out). Oog staggers Rex with a clothesline. He follows with an underhook face drop and then fails at a pin. He grabs Rex with his ankle lock and the dinosaur reaches the ropes. Rex gets up and Oog tries for a forward roll shoulderblock but Rex dodges it. He gives Oog a headbutt and the T-Rex Suplex. He follows with the Prehistoric Pounce and a Mighty Roar. He then performs the Dino Munch and the referee let's it slide. Rex goes for the pin and wins the match. Rex stands over the caveman triumphantly, the fued apperantly ended. Winner: Salacious Rex.

[theace4ever]

Werner, great write-up for the card.. I really enjoyed reading this first card of your fed. Cant wait to see who Mutato has in store for Manley. Im alittle disappointed that Pillchard was eliminated from the battle royal so early...but cool to see Busta Capp win it. Also enjoyed Johnny Satan causing trouble between Inbred Red and Koala Bruce.

[Omen]

Great fed Werner...Like the way you keep the tongue in the cheek....

[blueraider1]

great start for a new fed.

[rockajabroney]

yeah, this fed is going to be one of the better ones out there. very original stuff!
Keep 'em rollin' Werner!
Rayd

[Werner Mueck]

Thanks. Funny thing about battle royals, I've tried my battle royal chart three times. Pillchard was eliminated first in two matches, Sturgis Kahn was the second to the last in two matches, and Busta Capp won two matches. Marcus Memrbane came in second to last in one and was eliminated first in another. I don't know if this is coincidence or if my battle royal chart/system is too formulaic (is that a word?) Maybe it's the luck of the draw.

[Werner Mueck]

W3 Show #2

Cameras roll: Buddy Hotpants joins Undercover Alien at the announce booth. Buddy tells UA that last week’s short match with Koala Bruce took a lot out of him and Phatback decided to give him announcer duties this week. Buddy promises UA that they will have a “gay ole’ time, pardner.” Before he can say anything else, Salacious Rex’s music hits the arena speakers. The annoyed dinosaur man stomps to the ring. He flips off a few fans (or at least tries to, his little hands can’t seem to manage the advanced gesture).

Rex announces that the Oog fued is over. He will have no more matches with Oog as ordered by Phatback. “Last week was it.” He beat Oog at the PPV and he beat him soundly last week. It is time for Rex to get on with his career. He decides to make an open challenge. Anybody but Oog gets a shot at him, anywhere, anytime. UA comments about how foolish the open challenge is since Rex doesn’t possess anything that would make another wrestler want to risk getting in the ring to face him. Buddy agrees stating that he doesn’t really go for cold blooded men. Rex finishes his speech and storms out of the ring. A fan nearby waves a sign that says “Rantasaurus Rex” and Salacious quickly bites the man’s head off.

W3 OPENING VIDEO

Camera backstage. Phineus T. Phatback talks with Mona Mammeries in his office. He tells her that she’d better get in her wrestling gear, her first match in the women’s tournament is just about to start. Mona says that the tournament wasn’t supposed to start for a few more weeks. Phineus retorts, “We got our shipment of new female talent today. Amazon gave me an estimated 3 week delivery time and they came early and I have to use them. Sorry Mona but that’s just the way it is.”

The camera follows Mona as she walks through the backstage, not even knowing who she will face. She walks to the entrance. Her opponent is already in the ring. She is dressed in a French can-can outfit, awash in reds, yellows, and purples. She is rather striking but her beauty is soon overshadowed by the fact that she has masses of curly armpit hair.

SINGLES MATCH (Women’s Title Tournament)
Mona Mammeries vs. Fifi Cheveux Aisselle

Mona starts the match with a chest chop but telegraphs a back body drop and loses momentum. Fifi follows with a signature move, the Arche de Triomph, a beautiful fisherman’s suplex. It’s way to early in the match for a pin and Mona kicks out rather easily. Mona returns to her feet and is caught with a tumb in the eye and a shoulder block .She rebounds off the ropes with a clothesline. An attempted “Over th e sShoulder Boulder Hold” is broken when Fifi touches the nearby ropes. The match continues with a very high kick from Mona, a kickout from Fifi, and a rollover neck snap from Mona. The neck snap is avoided and Fifi plants a kick in Mona’s stomache. Mona catches the kick and performs a leg sweep. Fifi is tossed into the ropes. Mona avoids a clothesline and catches the French woman on the rebound with a second very high kick. She goes for the pin, wins the match and advances to the next round of the tournament. Fifi is furious over her debut loss and in her tantrum she is heard to say, “you can’t beat the French.” Winner: Mona Mammeries.

Camera backstage. At the concession stand. Morgoloth and Mo are filling up on energy drinks when Mar Far Jinx comes into the scene. “You was very mean to me last week, Mr. Morgoloth,” Mar Far complains. Phineus T. Phatback can be seen in the background scarfing hoagies. Mar Far continues to verbally assault Morgoloth and the big man ignores Mar Far as his brother, Mo downs a twinkie. Mar Far taps Morgoloth’s shoulder to get his foe’s attention. Morgoloth spins and slams Mar Far with a forearm. He rams the alien into a brick wall. Phatback watches and says nothing. Morgoloth picks up a box of hamdingers and beans Mar Far with it. Phineus says nothing. Morgoloth then powerbombs Mar Far through the concession table. Phineus continues to say nothing. Mo accidently drops his twinkie in Phineus’ lap, getting creamy filling all over PTP’s expensive pants. Phineus then has Morgoloth escorted away by security and tells him he’s banned from the building until next week for causing reckless mischief.

Camera announcer’s table. Buddy Hotpants comments on how that filling will leave a stain on PTP’s trousers. “Better to burn them to have them found and used against you later.” Undercover Alien interrupts, explaining that the winner of last week’s battle royal had been rewarded with a Hyper Championship title shot.

HYPER-CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Shiitake Jr. (ch) vs. Busta Capp

Busta starts the match by jabbing his finger into Shiitake’s eye. He follows with a knee smash, a powerful sidewalk slam, and the Compton Shuffle. Feeling a quick and early victory at hand, he foolishly climbs to the top rope and signals for the Ghetto Guillotine leg drop. Shiitake catches him with a raised foot and both wrestlers writhe on the mat. Shiitake gets up first and catches Busta with a dropkick using the middle rope as a springboard. He follows with an arm wringer and an ensiguiri kick. Busta takes his chance to leave the ring to rest. Shiitake bounces off the far ropes, gains momentum, and flings himself over the top rope towards Busta. Busta rols out of the way and makes it back into the ring before Shiitake is counted out. Busta is annoyed but satisfied in the thought he’s assured another shot at the belt due to the count out victory. Winner: Busta Capp.

Camera locker room. Salacious Rex is wearing a t-shirt that says “Humans make me sick.” On the back it says “They give me diarrhea”. He begins to shuffle through his locker as a voice calls out to him from behind. “Me accept challenge”. Rex turns around and is confronted by a masked man who is obviously Oog in disguise. Rex doesn’t take him seriously. “Me Masked Oog, me challenge Rex. Open challenge.” Rex refuses and tells the wrestler to go “fulfill your death wish somewhere else”. The Masked Oog replies with “You challenge! Me fight! Me demand match! Finus Fatman give me match!.” With that, The Masked Oog stomps out of the locker room.

TAG TEAM MATCH (non-title)
Octopus Johnson and La Cucaracha Grande (ch) vs. Koala Bruce and Pillchard

The match starts with Cucaracha in control as he chops Bruce and attempts a monkey flip. Bruce lands on his feet and hits the bug man with a slingshot body block. Bruce is elbowed in the corner and Cucaracha tags out. Octopus Johnson goes for a juso throw but his attempt is blocked. He then tries a suction cup slam and is successful. He sprays ink in Bruce’s face while a sleeper hold is applied. Bruce makes it to the ropes, wipes ink from an eye and manages to catch Johnson’s bad attempt at a back drop. He flings himself toward Pillchard and tags out.

Pillchard comes in on fire. He plays to the crowd and then hit’s Octopus with a vicious Pug Butt. Johnson stumbles back into his own corner and Cucaracha tags in. Pillchard hits the bug with a jumping splash, and a back drop suplex, all while playing to the crowd. Cucaracha nails him with a side kick and flings Pillchard into the ropes. He clotheslines the pug and slaps on a crossface that Pillchard manages to break by grabbing the ropes. Cucaracha plants a spinwheel kick and tries a hiptoss driver. He can’t pick Pillchard up and the pug capitalizes on the mistake with a gutwrench powerbomb. He goes for the pin and Cucaracha kicks out.

It’s about this time that Pillchard notices Koala Bruce is nowhere to be seen. He looks to his corner and up the ramp. He takes a few crucial seconds to scan the crowd but he doesn’t see his partner anywhere. While he’s doing this, Octopus Johnson is tagged in. Pillchard doesn’t see that either. Octopus slaps on the Iron Octopus Hold from behind and Pillchard manages to struggle out of it by getting to the turnbuckle. Pillchard get’s to close to Cucaracha who grabs the pug’s head and neck snaps him on the top rope. Pillchard staggers back to the middle of the ring and Johnson slaps on his finisher again, this time putting the pug-man out for the win. Winners: Octopus Johnson and La Cucaracha Grande.

Camera announcer’s table. Undercover Alien explains that the next match was signed after the camera’s stopped rolling last week. Both Hardcorpse and Lil’ Torquemada complained to Phineus about being eliminated by Chalupacabra in the battle royal. Phineus decided to relieve the situation by putting all three men in a triple threat match. Buddy adds that it might as well be a handicap match. “Chalupacabra has his little hands full tonight: he’ll be facing two of the most sadistic men ever to compete in the W3.” He then rambles on about bondage, torture, and fetishes and the camera promptly cuts to the ring.

TRIPLE THREAT MATCH (Battle Royal Grudge Match)
Chalupacabra vs. Lil’ Torquemada vs. Hardcorpse

Torquemada and Hardcorpse decide to double team Chalupacabra for eliminating them both during last week’s battle royal. The two villains hit Chalupacabra with a double suplex and a round of stomps. Torquemada hits Chalupacabra with Iron Maiden thumb thrusts and then tosses him out of the ring. He slams Chalupacabra’s head into the apron and then he rolls the luchidore back into the ring for Hardcorpse to work over. Hardcorpse gives Chalupacabra the brass knuckle noogie and is promptly warned by the referee. He pins Chalupacabra and gets a close two count. Lil’ Torquemada rushes into the ring and gets into a shoving match with Hardcorpse. He doesn’t appreciate Hardcorpse’s attempt at the victory.

Torquemada takes advantage with a flurry of punches but Chalupacabra dodges them. He hits Torquemada with two leg lariats. He then kicks Torquemada in the huevos. Hardcorpse hits Chalupacabra from behind and then goes for an atomic whip rope crotching. Chalupacabra lands on the apron instead of the rope, shoulder blocks Hardcorpse in the gut, and then executes a sunset flip over the ropes for a pin. Hardcorpse kicks out. Chalupacabra then punishes Hardcorpse with a turnbuckle clothesline and goes for a shoulder tackle. Hardcorpse blocks and slams him with captured headbutts. Hardcorpse goes for the pin after a painful Undead Driver but Torquemada makes the save. Torquemada performs a series of thumb thrusts and then blows a sleeper hold (how do you knock out a zombie)? Torquemada is tossed to the arena floor for his troubles and hit with a chair. As Hardcorpse enters the ring, Chalupacabra kicks him in the huevos. There is no effect so Chalupacabra goes for another kick to the huevos. He then hops to the turnbuckle and plants a Tope con Carne. Chalupacabra goes for the pin and gets it as Torquemada struggles to climb to the apron. The moral of this match is don’t waste you’re time kicking a zombie in his dusty dumplings when a risky high flying move will do the trick. Winner: Chalupacabra.

Camera backstage. Pillchard is wearing his infamous “Pug….. Now you’ve stepped in it.” t-shirt. He confronts Koala Bruce on his disappearance earlier. Koala explains the situation. While Pillchard was the legal man, Inbred Red came out and blind sided him. Red dragged Bruce to the back. Koala Bruce also notes that Red’s appearance and demeanor were both rather off. He was acting a bit nuts and he stunk worse than usual. Bruce concludes with “This Inbred Red joker is a fan favorite and he puts my shrimp on the barbie. I’m a fan favorite too and I don’t know what to do about it, mate.” Pillchard believes Koala Bruce and says he reviewed the replay (now that’s a novel idea, Pillchard isn’t as dumb as most wrestlers). He tells Koala Bruce to devote his time to clearing up this supposed misunderstanding with Red. Pillchard will find another partner to continue the fight with Mutato’s henchmen and he’ll ask PTP for another tandem match next week.

SINGLES MATCH (Women’s Title Tournament)
Eager Beaver vs. The Rhinestone Cowgirl

Eager Beaver peers at the cow ani-woman with a puzzled look on her face. She’s not sure how to tackle this adversary. Beaver doesn’t know anything about the cow. She’s shocked when the Cowgirl offers a handshake to open the bout. Beaver suspiciously accepts the hand and nothing vile comes of it. The match begins with a discus forearm from Beaver which is absorbed by Cowgirl. Cowgirl is then caught with a sunset flip after a botched back body drop. Instead of rolling back for the pin, Cowgirl sits down. She then goes for a cow flop but misses; Beaver quickly rolls out of the way. Beaver follows with a bulldogging clothesline and a bronco buster. A few more similar moves have no extraordinary effect on the Cowgirl. Beaver goes for an ankle lock knee smash and Cowgirl kicks out of it. Cowgirl goes for the Lasso From El Paso but doesn’t hold it for long. She then tries a rib breaker but Beaver jumps over her shoulders, pushing her into the turnbuckle. Beaver runs in for a move but is caught with a back elbow instead. She then catches Beaver with a Stampede shoulder block. She nails Beaver with a calf branding and then goes for a headbutt drop and misses. Both wrestlers lay on the mat and finally, Cowgirl gets to her feet. She flings Beaver into the ropes and telegraphs a back body drop. Beaver knee lifts and while Cowgirl staggers, Beaver picks her up (an immense strain) and delivers the Beaver Cleaver for the win. In a show of sportsmanship, Beaver helps Cowgirl to the entrance ramp and they are both assaulted by Wild Thang and left laying. Winner: Eager Beaver.

Camera Phat-o-Tron. After commercial break, a video plays on the Phat-o-Tron. All it says is “Granny is coming!” Buddy leans to Undercover Alien and says “I think I rented that video at the Adult Hut last week.” Undercover Alien notices a bit of commotion amongst the fans at ringside. Morgoloth and Mo can be seen bobbing back and forth over the wave of ringside spectators. Security meets them at the railing next to two empty seats. Morgoloth declares that he paid for two tickets, one for him and one for his brother so they have the right to be at ringside. UA comments on how expensive those tickets must have been to be seated on the ring side of the guard rail.

SINGLES MATCH (Non-Title)
Flex Manley vs. Sturgis Kahn

Before the match starts, Flex notices Morgoloth and Mo at ringside. He complains to the referee and then sends Mona Mammeries to the back for her own safety. The match begins with a cheap shot from Sturgis Kahn. Flex blocks a slow double ax handle and then staggers Sturgis with a big bicep clothesline. He body slams the biker and then misses an elbow drop. Sturgis hits Flex with a plam flurry and then is caught when he attempts a midsection kick. While holding the leg, Flex hits Kahn with two chest chops and then shoves him back into the turnbuckle. He follows Kahn in and hits him with a big meaty fist. As Kahn spins around in a daze, Flex lifts him up into the Flex Appeal for the win. The fans applaud the outcome but are disappointed in the length of the match. Winner: Flex Manley.

Flex begins his post match posing ritual as Morgoloth steps up to the apron. The two get into a screaming match and Flex is totally oblivious to the giant golem standing behind him. It’s Frankenpuss who catches the confused Flex with a big boot. He then lifts and drops Flex with the Frankenhammer and pretends to cover him. Flex is out. Morgoloth enters the ring and he and his brother stare down the Mutato representative. Sturgis Kahn starts stomping on the unconscious Manley and the other two villains decide to do the same. They beat on the champion for a minute or two. Suddenly, the crowd gasps as Johnny Satan rushes to the ring with a chair. Undercover Alien cries out over a possible four way beating when Satan enters and stares at the bloodied Flex. He looks at the other three who back off a bit and take in their evil handiwork. Satan raises his chair at the prone Flex and then buries it in the head of Frankenpuss, sending him toppling out of the ring. Morgoloth, Mo and Sturgis are shocked as all are smashed with Satan’s chair. The show ends with Flex being hauled out on a stretcher, Satan at his side, and Undercover Alien screaming over Satan’s actions: "Good Gawd", "What the hell", and "Did Flex make a deal with the devil"?

Ultimate Champion: Flex Manley
Hyper Champion: Shiitake Jr.
Tandem Champions: Octopus Johnson and La Cucaracha Grande
Women’s Champion: Vacant

[theace4ever]

wow Werner this was great...not too mention hilarious...Pillchard friggin rules! The Buddy Hotpants color commentary was a riot! This is one of my favorite feds out there and cant wait until the next episode.

[blueraider1]

grand card werner.i did a second card for my w3 fed also.

[KethVale]

great card Werner, love the announce team only thing missing was Suzy and Wild Thang :-)

[Wildfire]

great stuff... I really like the concept... I can't wait to start using these guys